Ethiopia Vaz: Coming to Carolina

New Blessing

2011-04-19T15:32:00.000-07:00

I know I never post to my blog anymore but mainly I'm never on my pc to sit down and write anything, but I should have posted this a long time ago (well, almost 3 months ago).

We have a new son - Griffin. He was born prematurely and spent 3 weeks in the NICU but is doing great and is a huge blessing to our family.

My older 3 are doing great with him and they truly love him. It is super cute to see. We have managed to stay on top of homeschooling as well. I did point out that most teachers get a maternity leave but that I did not. So I should get a big bonus from my boss (or husband :) ).

We also celebrated our 10 year anniversary a month ago. Hard to believe its been 10 years. We have had some highs and lows and I'm so glad we experienced all of them together. Its allowed us to grow closer to each other and to God. What a blessing that is.

Merry Christmas

2010-12-16T09:18:00.000-08:00

Well, I have not posted in a long time so I'll try and do an update on the family. I find that it is hard to get on the pc these days and I find that when I want to write something that I think of it in my head but never find the time to write it down.

So the reason I have not been on the computer much is because of home schooling, but that is okay because I feel like so far home schooling has been a huge blessing to all of us. Not that it is always easy but boy has it been wonderful. Besides being able to challenge my children more academically I also feel that we are growing to rely on each other as a family more. I love spending time w/ all my kids and enjoy that I get to be with them more then their teacher. I am also noticing that as they spend more time together that they fight less. Not that they never fight (boy would that be nice) but I believe they have learned to work things out better and I find that another huge blessing.

I think the biggest challenge is entertaining our little guy but I have made changes and we are doing the best we can. He gets two a.m. when it is just him and me and I think both of us love that time. We take gymnastics one day which he loves (and he is working on cartwheels and can push up to a hand stand at times). The biggest problem with entertaining BT is that he never sits still and loves to throw things. We did do a big clean up of the play room and his toys are easier to find and we take turns playing with him as we work on school.

Logan and Kendra also did soccer this year and both really enjoyed it. It was both of their first years and I think they got a lot out of it. Logan began to blossom by the end of the season and Kendra, when she was not chatting, could get after it too. B is a natural and can already kick the soccer ball.

L & K continue with martial arts and are both doing great and in a few months L will be in their advance kids club which he is so excited about.

But besides that we are doing well. We are already on Christmas break so I am a little antsy with no routine and not knowing what to do in the cold wet weather but we are having fun and I'm enjoying some down time.

Merry Christmas

Catching up

2010-11-07T05:22:00.000-08:00

I was looking at my blog and seen that it has been over a month since I posted last. At times I think of a lot of good things to post but don't seem to have time these days to sit down and actually type out what is on my mind.

Homeschooling is going great here. I am so incredibly happy with our decision and LOVE the extra days a week I get to spend w/ my older 2. I am really enjoying that they get to go to school 2 x / week and spend the other days with me. I have found that it is easy to get behind in house work, etc. now though but I keep telling myself my job is to teach and be their mom and the house work can get done later. Luckily for me a little girl came in my room at 4:00 a.m. and once she woke me up I could not get to sleep so now I am getting the laundry done in a very quiet house.

K's school is only 1/2 day so I get 2 mornings a week w/ BT. One morning we do gymnastics and he is crazy about it. Now, my little guy is crazy too when it comes to gymnastics. He can jump up in to a handstand and then can fall back in to a back bend. Now he is bendy and has no fear at all but he goes crazy. He runs and just does handsprings which sometimes end up as headspring and they scare me. But he just goes and goes and does back rolls. He loves picking up K (which we do right after gymnastics and some free play at the gym) and telling her he went to gymnastics. I have some video which I need to post of him.

We had a great Halloween. All 3 kids dressed up as Avatar, the last air bender (a cartoon on Nick). So, Ang, the Avatar, has a bald head, so we buzzed Logan's head to a 1. I was loving his hair but he looks really good w/ a bald head and I think he will want to keep it this way for a while. His new haircut gets him lots of attention too.

We just finished our 1st soccer season for both L&K. It was a really fun year. 1st off, B can kick a ball better then most kids and he is 2. It is crazy watching him dribble a ball. L really improved a lot during soccer and I think is really getting in to it. K, well, she had fun and had lots of energy to talk and play. Sometimes she was super aggressive on the field and other times she was picking flowers. At her end of season party the coaches did say she always was helping the other team up and checking to see if they were okay. I was telling her she needed to be a little more competitive and she informed me that God made us all different.

L&K are both also doing martial arts. It is fun watching both of them improve and how much they both enjoy it. At times I get burned out being at the dojo so much as L&K are in different classes and so we spend a lot of time there.

That is kind of it from here. We had a great weekend w/ no soccer and went on a family hike on Saturday. It was great to get out and enjoy the beauty of CA w/ the 3 kiddos.

I would like a nice house

2010-10-01T10:39:00.000-07:00

So, in NC Andrew and I skipped the starter home and bought a home we felt like we could be in for a long time. Our house was nice and big and fit our family great. It did not have all the bells and whistles of some homes but it had everything and more that we wanted.

Now, fast forward to CA where the cost of living is astronomical and houses are old and a lot of them need so much work that we would actually have to consider doing remodeling in a house we bought while we rented another home.

So, the other day I was taking a walk w/ the 3 kids and we were talking about houses and I was like wouldn't you guys rather live in a house like our friends in NC that is big and nice and has a pool instead of living out here where they are expensive and not as nice. And they said to me "We had rather live here because this is where our friends are."

Then it hit me, what am I teaching my children. That the size and the amenities of a house makes it a good home. That I value bigger and better over friends.

Now, please don't get me wrong, NC has the best friends I have ever had in my life so a huge part of my reason I want to move back is to be with them so it is not just about the nice, big house that we can afford there. But I realized I need to make sure I am teaching my kids the right values and for them their friends are in CA and so this is where they want to be. They don't care that our bathrooms are so small and that our outlets don't have 3 prongs. They just care that they can go next door and play w/ their friends. I hadn't even realized the lesson I was teaching my kids.

So, now I will not try and convince them we should move b/c of housing prices b/c I don't want to be teaching them a wrong lesson.

Yes, I would still like a nice house but I'll just nag Andrew about that when they are not around :)

And I will trust that God has a plan for us and that one day we will own a house and will make it our home and we will surround ourselves with the love of God, each other and friends.

How it's going

2010-09-21T06:43:00.000-07:00

So, we are in week 4 of homeschooling and so far it has been great. I am enjoying all the extra time that I get to spend with L&K that I would not have if they were in school 5 days a week. I enjoy time to laugh, play, pray, learn, grow, and just be together. I am enjoying helping them and seeing what areas of school come easier to them and what areas they struggle with. I am also enjoying all that I am getting to relearn again.

The co-op so far is going well. I think they are both really liking their new classes and have started to get to know the kids in their class. K's class is small - 6 kids and L's is 10 - 12 (I'm not for sure). I am also enjoying the mornings I have just w/ B. It is nice to have some quality 1:1 time to spend just with him as I've never really gotten that.

Andrew takes L&K to school the 2 days they go and I am loving that he gets special time with them and he is absolutely loving it too. They talk and he listens, they roll down the windows and play music super loud, and they just enjoy that extra time they get together.

L is loving science. He gets so excited for science class. The other day he asked me if he could take another science class and there is a Bible study that does a science class for home schooled children so I signed up for the Bible study and for L&K to take the science class. I am hoping to connect with some other homeschooling moms and L can't wait for another day of hands on science.

The thing that has changed is that at night I can no longer just veg in front of the tv. I have work plans to get ready and workboxes to fill. It is a change having to do work.

I also get to make a cake for Logan's science class tomorrow. We will make it today but it is supposed to show the layers of the earth and have the continents/oceans iced on it. I'll try and post pics soon.

So, that is a quick update of how school is going. I know it sounds all yeah and only positive but that is the attitude I am taking towards it and I truly think we are all loving it.

School

2010-08-31T15:06:00.000-07:00

So, L&Ks first day of school was yesterday. It was L's 3rd new school and he is only in 2nd grade. The decision to switch was hard and this was one of the many reasons but after dropping L&K off, Andrew & I both felt that we made the right decision. We know L&K are both resilient and will do great. K already had met 4 of the other 6 kids in her class so I know that helped her a lot. She started off shy but that lasted about 2 minutes till she was speaking up. I am not for sure the ratio of boys to girl in L's class yet as they start off with spelling and not everyone is in their grade for spelling. I did ask him for a classmate's name and he was able to give me two. K,B, & I went and met him for lunch and after that we played with the rest of her classmates for a bit (Kindergarten in only 1/2 day).

Today, was our 1st day of homeschooling and it went well. I was up super late for me getting things ready but it helped to be organized. I am somewhat doing a system I found on line called the workbox system. Basically, each kid has 10 boxes and they go through them 1 by 1. Logan's boxes are filled and sometimes with more then one activity. B was not too hard either. He liked it when I got out two big bowls and filled one with cotton balls and he had to move them to the other bowl with a spoon. When he got bored with that he did it with tongs.

We are done and only have martial arts left for today. It is nice being done by 3:00. So, this sums up our 1st 2 days of school. I also have to say it was not as hard taking Kendra to school for the first time since I know I get to see her 3 out of the 5 school days. B also was super cute b/c when L&K put on their backpacks he went and put his on too. You can't see it in the pics b/c the straps are the same color as his jacket.

Where we have been and what's new

2010-08-26T15:07:00.000-07:00

So, it has been a while since I posted last and we have been super busy. We sepnt 20 out of 21 days away from home. The first journey in our vacation was to Ethiopian Heritage camp. We spent 3 nights in the Santa Cruz mountains with other families who have adopted from Ethiopia as well as many Ethiopians who came to help us learn and older adopted Ethiopian children who shared their stories with us. It was a great time. Great to be with families who love Ethiopia as much as you and who desire to share as much as they can with their children (both bio and adopted) about Ethiopia. We were able to listen to older adopted children talk and gained a wealth of information from them. We hope to store a lot of this information away for when BT gets to a point that questions come as we want to answer him in an honest and loving way that makes him feel secure in our love and secure that it is okay to mourn and miss the life and family he left behind. Some of the children talked about their journey back to Ethiopia. There stories were incredible and it was an honor to listen to them.

After we left the Ethiopian Heritage camp we came home for one night and did laundry and packed. Monday we took a red eye to TX to visit my family. We were in 100 degree Austin for 9 days and had a fabulous time. We then left TX to go to 95 degree Florida to visit Andrew's family. We had absolutely the best time with both families and want to hear something awesome - I did not have to cook or do the dishes or clean the whole 16 days that we were gone :) I did do laundry though. The 3 kids loved being with their grandparents and one of their Aunts so much. They miss them terribly and want to go back asap. So wonderful to be able to spend time with them for all of us.

Now, we are back in CA. It was nice coming back to cooler weather but it has been super duper hot the last 3 days and we don't have AC so 109 (what my temperature gauge said) is hot especially when you can't even open the windows to cool down.

School started here on Monday but we did not go. We made the decision in June to homeschool L&K. They will be attending a private Christian school MW and will be homeschooled 3 times per week. This was not an easy decision for Andrew and I to make as we felt like the local school was a great community and had a lot to offer but I have to tell you that I am so excited that I get to spend so much time a day w/ L&K (&BT but he would be home w/ me anyway). I get to be directly involved in their education. I do have some self doubts but oh I am so excited. We start on Monday.

So, that is where I've been. More stuff to come soon but here are some pics from our wonderful vacation.

Is she adopted? and picks from BT's 1st haircut

2010-07-27T09:42:00.000-07:00

So, the other night Kendra was in a bouncy house and Andrew brought Brandon over. This little girl went up to Kendra and asked who the little boy was. Kendra said he is my brother. The girl then asked if Andrew was Kendra's Dad and she said yes and the girl said "Oh you are adopted."

This is not the 1st time I have been asked this question. A lady I knew from martial arts asked if Kendra was adopted b/c she knew B was and thought Kendra did not look 1/2 Indian (it was in the winter before her summer tan).

I think one thing interesting about our family is how people can't figure out how we all fit together but it does not truly matter how we all came to fit together but that we fit together so well and make a wonderfully beautiful family.

On another note, BT got his 1st haircut this weekend. We went to an Ethiopian barber a friend had used. I was hesitant about getting it cut but Andrew felt like it needed some shaping up so I gave in. The barber took off a little more then I would have liked but it looks really good. He did a great job w/ B's hair line and an AA lady at Church even commented on what a good job was done, especially at the hairline for a 2 year old. And if you are wondering how his hair was cut. They pick it out to be straight and then just cut around. The barber never used his finger (like they do when they cut my hair) to hold the hair. He would pick it out again and then cut some more (too much if you ask me but it will grow back). You will notice in the 1st pictures (before) his hair falls in to ringlet curls but now that it is shorter they are more just curls and not so spirally.

Yoga

2010-07-15T08:27:00.000-07:00

So, when Andrew and I first started dating he was really in to yoga and took classes often. As for me, I ran, played basketball, etc. Things I considered "real" workouts. I kind of thought yoga was this easy workout where you just breathed and stretched.

Now, fast forward 10 years and I am the one who is in to yoga. I absolutely love it. It is such a great work out and I leave feeling like I got a great work out yet completely revitalized.

For the past 2 weeks I have had trouble getting up and working out except for my yoga days. On those days I seem to have no problem waking up at 5:00 to go to the gym. I get so much out of these work outs. I told Andrew if I was to do it all over again I would just join a yoga studio instead of a gym b/c I could do it all the time. And as for running, well w/ a bad knee and 2 bad achilles it does not happen (well I did run on the 4th of July in a 4 mile race in our neighborhood b/c Logan wanted me to and I was not going to tell him no b/c I am too young to not be able to do what my kids want me to. I ran w/ him through mile 2 and then he walked for about 400 feet and then said lets run and took off and I could not keep up. He finished (at age 7 w/out training) a 4 mile run in 41 minutes and I was about a minute and a half behind him which was not too bad for a lady who has not run in 4 years).

Now, if I can get as motivated to do my other workouts as I am to do yoga.

Lenient or strict??

2010-06-23T11:27:00.000-07:00

So, I was talking to my Mom yesterday and she asked if my sister (Ashlea) had told her the question she asked her. I said no (which surprised my Mom since she says we tell each other everything (which is pretty true)). So, she told me she asked my sister if I was a lenient mom or a strict mom. I asked my Mom what my sister said and she asked me to answer first. So I said in the middle.

She did not tell me what my sister said (even though I called my sister and found out and she said I was fairly strict) but she told me I was between the middle and strict. At first I was hurt. A the time I didn't know why, but I was.

So, Andrew came home and I told him about our conversation and he was happy that my Mom's answer was fairly strict. He said that was a good thing. So I started thinking and I realized when my Mom said I was strict I heard that to be that I was a mean Mom and that is what made me sad. But really it is not the same at all and Andrew's response made me realize that it is okay that I am not lenient with our children. Being a Mom is my job and I have to do the best job I can. They are our legacy and we are responsible to raise them in the best way we can. I also took strict to be a Mom that was not fun and I try to have a lot of fun with my children. I try to play with them and love them but I also try to set boundaries and rules and want them to have manners, respect, etc.

So, if someone asked you what type of Mom you were what would you say and would you be okay with the answer?

Sometimes its just the small things in life

2010-06-17T14:55:00.000-07:00

Sometimes it is just the little things in life that can make your day.

The other day K sat on my lap to kiss me. So, her little brother had to do the same. Then they both started kissing me and each had to kiss me more. So I sat there and kissed them back and they kissed me so much that my lips were sore. Talk about a small thing that brightens your whole day.

Laundry. No laundry does not make me happy but summer does b/c the kids wear sandals and since they wear sandals they do not wear socks and that makes for a lot less laundry to do (and I don't like folding socks).

What small things make your day?

Different Cultures

2010-06-10T09:08:00.000-07:00

We were out of town for 10 days for a wonderful vacation. The 1st part was spent in our old stomping ground of NC catching up w/ many old friends. It was also a time for the 5 of us to relax. We stayed at a friend's house and they have a beautiful back yard w/ an incredible pool. We spent hours there just swimming and hanging out. It was so relaxing and very much needed.

After our time in NC we headed up to the DC area as my SIL was getting married. Once we were in DC we were on the go almost the whole time but it was a good on the go. K & I missed the 1st get together as she threw up but after a good nap she was talking non stop so we knew she felt better and luckily the boys did not get it.

My SILs wedding was great. The ceremony was beautiful and both her and her now husband looked wonderful. Andrew & I both did a reading and L,K&B were the ring bearers and flower girl. They were all super well behaved :) I told them they had to behave during the ceremony but could do whatever they wanted at the reception. So what did Logan want to do with me at the reception while I was wearing a floor length gown - wrestle :)

The reception was a lot of fun and the kids and I changed into traditional Indian outfits. When Andrew & I got married folks asked us if we were having an American and Indian wedding, but what most folks consider an Indian wedding is part of a Hindu ceremony which last several days and Andrew's family is Catholic so we combined their village traditions in to our wedding (as did my SIL).

I have to say that being part of a culture that is different than the one I grew up with is absolutely awesome. I just get to experience things that I never would have. And Andrew's family is so super amazing and they just embrace me and accept me and educate me :) I truly enjoy the difference in Andrew's and my family. It is fun seeing how they are different yet both are rooted in love & Christ. Andrew's family loves to party and dance and just have a good time. So does mine but we hang out, play board games, etc. And I get to wear beautiful clothes that I probably would not have worn. Not that I could not have worn it but I doubt I would just wear a sari b/c it is beautiful. But now I get to and I have an excuse (and even if I didn't having worn Indian outfits before I now have the confidence to wear them).

Here are some pics of us dressed up. My SIL picked out my sari and she did a wonderful job. I love the colors. And my SIL looks gorgeous in her sari. Really, she is stunning :) And my in-laws picked out the kids last time they were in India and they did a great job. Everyone looked so good!

When what you think it is not reality - our boys orphanage

2010-05-13T15:17:00.000-07:00

So, the other day I saw a post about some news regarding Ethiopian adoptions. The big part of this announcement was that you now have to travel 2x, but also included in this was a list of orphanages that closed. Listed on this was the orphanage that both Zinabu and BT were at. I immediately emailed our agency to find out why and did not get a super clear answer but it seems like it was not for unethical behavior but for conditions of the orphanage.

This broke me up. For several reasons. The first and hardest is Zinabu was at one of these orphanages and he got sick there and died. I started wondering what if he was somewhere else. Would he have been okay. Did they not take care of my little boy? The second was that I had built up the idea of this orphanage in my head. I even read what I wrote a year ago when I picked him up and said "oh how you were loved." Now, maybe he was loved and conditions of the orphanage may not have anything to do with the love the nannies provided. But I had built it up in my head like this great amazing place and to see that it was so bad that it was shut down hurt. Now, I know BT was just a baby but those are emotionally very important developmental times and I kept wondering could there be a side effect from it. I thought he seemed very happy when he was got him and wouldn't say he was not cared for but still I wonder. I have also emailed a few families whose children were at these 2 orphanages and even though some said they were surprised others said that they thought it was a good thing and that they were not surprised based on some things with respects to their children.

It is just heart breaking when you find out something you thought of one way probably was not.

I am doing much better about it now but it was a hard few days to take it all in. I am still very thankful for the nannies who loved him. Even though it may not have been what I had imagined it was something.

The cover of People

2010-05-11T09:34:00.000-07:00

So, we were at the grocery store the other day with just Brandon. I was checking out and Andrew was holding B. Brandon saw the cover of the People Magazine with Sandra Bullock on it with her son. He looked at Andrew and then pointed at Sandra and said Mommy and then he pointed at her son and then pointed to himself. He did this several times.

I found it interesting that he would think that. Not that I look anything like Sandra Bullock but I do have somewhat similar coloring to her as he does to her son.

I remember when Kendra was little she used to see anyone in a wedding dress and think it was me.

And on a side note - Kendra learned to ride her bike last week w/out training wheels and she is now doing great. She is actually riding better w/out training wheels then when she had them on! Way to go Kendra!! I'll try and take a picture soon.

Boys' Birthday

2010-05-09T21:46:00.000-07:00

So, my boys birthdays are 5 days apart. That calls for a very busy time. B turned 2 on 4/30. Wow, he is 2. He had a great birthday. He got a ball from L and a baseball and bat from K. He loves balls and sports so these were great and he was so happy. He had fun taking the tissue paper out of the bag from the gift my folks got him. We got him a tricycle and he loves it. The cool thing about it is that when you turn the handle you use to push it that the front wheel turns so you can steer it why you walk with him.

The day after B's 2nd birthday we had the boys' birthday party. I was so busy preparing for this. I made 3 jedi robes (one in each size for my kids). These were to wear after the kids were trained to be jedi's and fought Darth Mal and Darth Vader. I forgot and went and got them and had to let the kids fight more. I used noodles to make light sabers and with 21 kids running around hitting each other I think they were a much better choice over plastic light sabers. Andrew dressed up as the jedi and trained the kids and then a friend and my cousin's husband dressed up as the bad guys. Andrew taught the kids a routine and had them do this as they individually fought the dark side. Then Andrew had them take the jedi oath and we presented each kid with a jedi certificate. I tried to make cupcakes that looked like light sabers. I made marshmallow fondant, colored it, rolled it out and attempted to make it look like light sabers. I think they were okay but I wish the fondant had hardened up more so the light sabers were not so limp. For B's cupcakes I did trains. I had started his birthday party 45 minutes earlier to have time to be just about him but once kids got to the part and got the light sabers that did not happen (so I think from now on out we will probably do individual parties). We also played a jedi training game where folks threw noodles at the kids and if you got hit you were out. We also put up pictures of the dark side and light side and had the kids use a clone trooper gun to shoot the guys. If you hit someone on the dark side you got 50 points and if you hit someone on the light side then you lost 20.

3 days after the party Logan turned 7. His big gift from us & my folks was a new bike. We gave him about 4 riddles and he had to go around the house finding the next clue. Finally he went to the garage where his new bike (with gears) was. He was so excited. When I asked him about his birthday party and if it was good he said no it was not good, it was amazing :) and he told us his gifts were his best gifts ever. Kendra got him a gift card to Panera (his favorite restaurant) and Brandon got him nerf swords and ax.

Happy Birthday my 2 boys! We love you both so much. You each add so much to our family.

Here is also a pic of my 3 jedis attacking my Dad.

Bone Marrow Donor - can you help?

2010-05-06T13:48:00.000-07:00

This is from a man who works w/ my husband. Can you help?

All
Ishita is our beautiful, smart, loving and wonderful daughter who has become gravely ill with disorder called Hemophagocytic lymphohistiocytosis or HLH.
She needs donated bone marrow that very closely matches her own for a transplant. So far, we have not been able to find a match for our daughter. Ethnicity is crucial when matching donors. There is a critical shortage of Indian donors in the registry. So we need your help. Ishita needs your help.
We need as many people as possible to quickly join the National Bone Marrow Registry. Every donor will give Ishita and other people in our dire situation another breath of hope.
Think of it: You could hold the key to curing Ishita's disease, or the disease of another sick child or adult, inside you right now. Please join the registry. Please spread the word. We appreciate your help in creating a tsunami of marrow registrations.

Read Ishita's story at www.caringbridge.org/visit/mannat
How you can help:
REGISTER AS A POTENTIAL MARROW/STEM CELL DONOR

   a. Attend a live drive (the easiest and fastest way to get tested)
   We are conducting a bone marrow drive this Saturday, May 8th 2010:
      Location: Sunnyvale Temple
   Address: 420 Persian Drive Sunnyvale CA
   Time: 11-5 pm
   Date:  Saturday, May 8th 2010
   To see other live drives
      www.marrow.org/HELP/Events/index.html
   or
      www.aadp.org >> calendar >> drives
   or
   b. Request a home test kit at www.aadp.org/pages/register.php.
       Four cheek swabs and you are changing a life.
Regards
Sumit and Neha

Mommy, Daddy, Bubbee, 'Endra

2010-04-28T18:40:00.000-07:00

So, whenever we are out and about B gets lots of attention. Because he is little and cute and has a personality that is so big it engages people. So, when folks talk to him he always points to each one of us and says who we are - Mommy, Daddy, Bubbee (he can't say Logan so this is his way of saying brother) and 'Endra (aka - Kendra). It is like he is letting folks know if you know him you should know the rest of his family. It is so cute and I love it.

But sometimes as he points to me I think how simple it is right now - I am Mommy. That is it. But at some point it won't be that simple. I'll always be his Mom but so his Momma in Ethiopia. She is and always will be. I try to prepare myself for the future when Mommy becomes a little more confusion. When he works through Mommy (me) and Momma (what we call his Mom in Ethiopia and whose picture hangs in his room). I try to listen to folks who are going or have gone through this already and try to store all of the good bits I get in my mind. But I realize each child is different so that when the time comes that we have to do our best to help B understand and hopefully work through the fact that he has two Mommas who both love him beyond words.

In 2 days our little guy turns 2! I am not for sure when the questions will start and at what point it becomes confusing and at what point it hurts. I am not for sure if all the emotions I am expecting will happen and if others I am not prepared for will. So I pray for this and do my best to store information I get in my mind (but boy do I seem to forget things these days).

B's beautiful Momma in Ethiopia is never forgotten. Not a day goes by that she does not come to my mind. She is in our prayers. I've sent pics over w/ other families who were traveling to his city of birth and hope she has received them. I hope she got them and they bring her some peace. I hope she knows how much he is loved. He is such a joy and sometimes I feel bad that she is missing out on all of it. She is so loved by us.

Ears

2010-04-04T15:16:00.000-07:00

So, our little dude has had ear problems and sinus issues since he we met him. Last week we went in to put in tubes and remove his adenoids. He did great in surgery and the dr. said he really needed both surgeries. He has been on antibiotics for 9 out of the last 11 weeks. Crazy, I know and yet his adenoids were still infected. His current antibiotic is extra strength and our poor guys bum is so beat up. It is red and bloody and bumpy and he cries when we change him. We are trying to give him bare bum time but it is hard when he is going diarrhea all the time. I feel so bad for him. I also have to say it was hard seeing him come out of anesthesia. He was so disoriented and strong and just cried and squirmed until he fell asleep on me and then when he woke up he was as happy as can be.

But about our amazing little boy. He has had all of these issues and has remained the happiest of kids. I mean, just happy. Our littlest dude is just a ball of sunshine. I took him to the audiologist 2 weeks ago and they commented on how special our little boy is. He said he sees kids all the time but not any that are as outgoing, happy, and well behaved as our son. Proud Momma moment. Then we went to the ENT to review the reports of x-ray and hearing test (which showed hearing lost that we are hoping is just from all the fluid but if not we will deal w/ it) and the dr. looked him and B just sat there happy and content. If the dr. needed an ear he would just let him look. Then he too commented on how rare and happy and well behaved our little guy was. Now, Daddy was here this time so proud Momma and Daddy :)

Since the surgery B has been great. Yesterday he had a fever to go along w/ the severe diaper rash and it was one of the first times that I saw a huge change in his personality (even w/ all the ear infections he has remained just happy). And it was nothing bad he just wanted us to hold him all day. So, we did and then we put him to bed bare bummed on me until he was asleep in our bed. Then we diapered our little guy up and laid on either side of him and just looked at him. Then Andrew said "I am so glad we adopted" and I said "I'm so glad we were able to grow our family just how we did b/c our children are amazing!"

So, we pray that our boy continues to heal and that this surgery will help him feel better and not be sick and on antibiotics all the time.

And did I mention he will be 2 this month! Wow, time is flying by.

Our Baby Girl is 5

2010-03-29T10:16:00.000-07:00

So, I am way behind on this but our beautiful daughter turned 5 a few weeks ago. We had a great time celebrating. My entire family was out here which is always incredibly fun.

My Dad actually came to visit for 2 weeks as he is now retired and can take time off. On a side note - I cried when he left. I usually cry when my family leaves as I miss them so much but this time I also cried b/c I got so used to having someone else around and loved having the help. Someone suggested I should get an aupair when I told them how nice it was to have help. Now, I can do this (well some days I can other days are a little rougher), but boy is it nice having someone who will help take the kids places, stay at home so B can take naps, babysit so I can have date time w/ my husband (we had 2 dates in 2 weeks), will watch my kids so I can go do doctors' appointments w/out them, and will even allow my sister and myself to go to the NCAA tournament so I could watch Vandy lose w/ 0.7 seconds left.

But for K's birthday we had a rainbow tea princess promenade party. I made the invites to look like rainbows and they said "The colors will come alive on the day Kendra turns 5." We had tea w/ sandwiches, scones, fruit, etc. Then we made bracelets and necklaces. Then we rolled out the red carpet and all the princesses and princes (everyone was dressed up) walked down the red carpet. Then behind a rainbow of streamers I took pictures of each kid w/ Kendra. Then we played pin the cloud on the rainbow and for the party favor each child got a tie dyed shirt (to go w/ the rainbow theme). My sister and I had stained hands for a few days from making the shirts. Here are some pics from my little girl's party (and 2 of my boys just b/c). I can't believe she is 5. She is amazing. She tells me she likes to give me kisses b/ I smile and boy do her kisses make my day. She lightens up our world. She is a blessing to us!

My family also also got to see Kendra's Bollywood show, a preschool show for K, and a baseball and basketball game for Logan. It was a crazy busy weekend but super fun.

Dreams - hard to let go

2010-03-11T05:02:00.000-08:00

So, do you ever have those kind of dreams (or nightmares) that you just can't let go of. The ones where you have a fight with your husband and wake up and are still angry at him? I do. And the other day I had one that woke me up in tears and bothered me for a few days. I do NOT like dreams like this. Where you wake up and you can't decide what is real and what is a dream and you are crying and scared and your worst fears were just lived out. Yuck!

It is amazing how active our minds can be when we are asleep.

Holding Hands

2010-03-04T15:08:00.000-08:00

I love that my kids hold hands. They hold hands with Andrew & I still. They hold hands with each other and at times all 5 of us hold hands. Brandon loves holding hands and being swung. He is so little that he can just hold our hands and pick up his feet and we barely notice.

Today, my son is having a play date. On the walk home they were holding hands. It was too cute. He often holds hands with the next door neighbor when they walk to school. I wonder when they loose the simple pleasure of holding their friend's hand. When does it become not a cool thing to do?

I am going to enjoy holding these 3 little hands while they are still little and want to hold my hand b/c I am aware that one day it will stop and all I'll be left with is holding Andrew's hand (which is not too bad either :) ).

Virus on Heather's Computer

2010-02-26T12:54:00.000-08:00

Heather's computer has a virus, please don't click on any links sent from her account for the time being.

thanks!
Andrew

Day 8, 9, 10, and 11

2010-02-21T19:45:00.000-08:00

So, we picked up BT on Tuesday and just began falling more and more in love with him. Look at his face and he is just as precious and cute on the inside. But really, how cute is he!!!

There is a rule in Ethiopia that you are not allowed to take adopted children out in public. I wish this wasn't the case b/c we would have done more sight seeing but we want to respect Ethiopia and their rules.

So, Wed. we left BT for a few hours and went to the University Museum. It was really cool. I wish I could have taken pics but you are not allowed. There was just so much history to absorb. We were also going to go to the museum which houses Lucy, the oldest skeleton ever found, but the bones were in the US. So we skipped it and headed back.

The sitter was so good with him but I was glad to get back and have him in my arms! I have issues leaving my kids and it was hard to leave him but we wanted to take in more of Ethiopia. I really don't think we did much that day besides hang out. We ate our meals in the hotel.

On Thursday we had our US Embassy appointment to get BT's visa. You think this would be nice and relaxing b/c we are on US soil but I found it stressful. We had a super long wait there and it was hot. They ask you a few questions and then they either do or do not issue your child their visa. Now, you may be thinking this is a sure thing but there was a family there who had been trying for 3 days to get their daughter's visa. It was heart breaking and we prayed for them as their plane left that night and there other children were at home waiting for them. After we made it through we went to get coffee. Now, we don't drink coffee but bought some for friends (as well as some coffee beans which we bought in Awasa for our friends who roast their own beans). B&M bought so much coffee that the shop ran out.

Now each morning we had pancakes with this jelly that we thought was so good. M and I went to several stores to try and find out what it was. We went to a few stores and could not find what we thought it was. So we went and asked the hotel to see it and it was apricot. We brought home 2 jars. When we got home we told the kids it was Ethiopian jelly so they tried it and loved it. Now that is the jelly of choice and they still call it Ethiopian jelly.

Friday was spent packing and preparing to leave. I was so sad to leave as I wanted to absorb more of Ethiopia but was SO ready to get home and see L&K and introduce them to BT. When we arrived at the airport we got our luggage and our contact, Al, said bye. It was so sad for me and I cried. I was not thinking he would be leaving us right then and he plays such a big part in the adoption it was hard to just leave.

We made it through security no problem, even though we were almost out of birr which made tipping hard. We had a long wait and did some more shopping. We saw an Ethiopian nativity set and Andrew talked me out of it since we would be moving and I wish I had bought it. There were so many adoptive families waiting. We finally boarded. Oh yeah, they did not want us taking on carry-ons but we had put all of our breakables in them. 3 times they asked to take them and check them but I said baby stuff was in it (which was true too) and then they had no problem letting us keep it. The overhead bins on the plane were actually fairly empty b/c no one had carry - ons. By the time we left it was 11:00 p.m. and BT was over tired. He cried and cried (this had to be one of the first times he cried) and it took me a while to get him calmed down and asleep. He slept for a super long time but I was holding him and found it hard to sleep on a plane with him in my arms. The plane was packed and we were in the middle of the 5 seats which was not the roomiest but we managed. We got off in DC and some how ended up being the last off of the tram that takes you to pick up your luggage and therefor were the last in line to get through customs. When you go to the US Embassy they give you this manilla envelope and it is sealed and you are not to open it. There is also a picture of the child on the envelope and the one of B was so cute. I took pics of it to have but asked if I could have it once they took out all the paperwork and they said yes. If not they were just throwing them in the trash.

In DC we ate at this hamburger place. Carla, a friend who also adopted from Ethiopia and who took pics of BT for us as well as hugging him, praying over him, and showing him pictures of us, had posted how she ate at the burger place when she was there and it made me crave it. So we ate there and then waited to board our flight home.

We talked to Andrew's folks as well as one of my best friends Heidi who was out of town and could not be at the airport to meet us. The flight home to Raleigh was short and I was so ready to touch down and be together as a family of 5. As we rounded the corner to get out I started crying. I was so overwhelmed to finally be together. I don't have pics of us coming home. I had asked my sister to video tape once I handed her the video camera and she did that but did not ask anyone to take my camera and take picures. But we not only have our video tape but a good friend also video taped it as well as interviewing our friends (thanks Amanda :) ). It was so good seeing our kids holding their signs. So good to introduce them to their little brother. This part is very blurry to me. I just see them (L&K) there (they looked so cute and good). My Mom had them dressed so nice and they had their signs up. We came to each other and as a family hugged. I remember seing my friend Beth come home and watching as her family all came together. It was something so special to witness. So many of our friends were there and it meant to much to us. They had been there for our journey and loved and supported us along the way. B sat there with all the kids surronding him. We talked to our friends. It was a great day. Our family day is on Sunday and we look forward to celebrating the day we came together as a family of 5. It was so nice to be home. I miss Ethiopia and long to go back again

Day 7 - In our arms

2010-02-17T05:12:00.000-08:00

So, I am writing this post and my body is fluttering w/ excitement. One year ago I held my precious little boy in my arms. This day was finally here. After so much pain and heart ache and fear and disappointment the day was here. The day for us to hold our baby boy. To get to know everything about him. To know his personality, to know his likes and dislikes, to see if he could sit, crawl, stand, etc. To get him off of the top bunk at the orphanage. To love him and kiss him and see him and touch him and love on him and pray over him. Wow!

So today was full of anticipation. We were so excited to get going. We had to gather all of the gifts for the nannies as well as our donations to the orphanages. We first went to pick up B&M son at the sister orphanage in Addis. It was so memorable and moving to watch as the held their son for the 1st time. This was also the orphanage that Zinabu was at. I, to this day, wish I had asked what he was like. What his personality was. But we hung out there while they got to know their son and got answers to their questions. There was this one little boy who just took Andrew & I in. I ended up finding out he was a boy for a family w/ our agency so I was able to get video of him. It was great. He just danced and smiled. He is finally home w/ his family - 10 months after we saw him. Soon, we got in the car and headed for Debre Zeit. Finally!

I believe, if I remember right, it is about a hours drive. We finally were getting close and Andrew started to video tape the drive. We saw a van that said something about Obama which I thought was interesting to see how excited folks were across the ocean for our new President. We also saw this girl walking w/ her sister down the street to the orphanage.

Finally, the car stopped and our drive honked. Then the doors opened.

Al asked who wanted to get their child first (B&M were also picking up an infant) and I asked if we could but we had to change to B&M getting their daughter first. So Andrew &I were able to capture this moment as well. And then, as they were holding their girl the head of the orphanage came around with this little boy in a red shirt and tan overalls and I let out a gasp.

B&M were so awesome and immediately grabbed out camera and video taped us as we met our son for the first time.

He was so tiny and so adorable and so precious and FINALLY in our arms!

He went to us no problem. He was very content and relaxed and as I put these pictures in this blog it is interesting b/c know if I saw a picture of him looking at us now I would see familiarity with who he was looking at. But I see him just taking us in trying to figure out who we are.

But we held him. Andrew videotaped for B&M while I sat down on the floor and talked to the social worker about BT. He was sitting in a tripod sit but it was not even a few days before he was able to sit no problem. He could crawl but an army crawl. He loved putting things in his mouth (still does). There was a pair of keys he was holding on and would not let go. They let us take them with us. We also were able to take him home in the outfit he is in (a 24 month old girl outfit :) ).

Then we went to see his room. I don't remember much about the orphanage. We got him so quickly and then it is all a blur.

I do feel like he was very well loved there. The nannies seemed to really be taken in by him (he does have a personality that just draws you in).

He was playing w/ the keys and got my face and he smiled. His first smile (I believe Andrew got it on video tape).

Finally we loaded up the car to head back to the hotel. We did ask how he slept at the orphanage and they laughed b/c they said he would wake up and just want to play (in the middle of the night). He did fall asleep in my lap on the way home. It was so hot and his poor head was just sweating. His ear was leaking puss. We had brought antibiotics w/ us and started him on them one we got back to the hotel.

The drive back was nice and he woke up when we started to unload the car.

He was supposed to take an afternoon nap but we could not get him down. So we played. We gave him a shower (which he did not love but he tolerated it). He loved biting on a toothbrush we got on Ethiopian Air.

Finally around 5 (I think) I put him in the sling and got him to go to sleep. Get this, he slept till around 8 the next morning. He did wake up for bottles but would go right back to sleep. He moved all over the bed (we were co-sleeping as they did not have a crib and b/c we like to). At midnight when he woke up Andrew was like I'll get up and play w/ him and I say why don't we see if he goes to sleep and he did right after his bottle. The poor guy was probably so incredibly exhausted from the day. We had played with him non-stop since we got back to the hotel and even though I feel like he got lots of attention I doubt it was ever for the long or only focused on him.

Now, he did have a smell when we picked him up and I don't mean a bad smell just a smell I did not know. It washed away after a few days. I miss it. It was part of him. I am sure it is just the smell of sweat, the smoke in the orphanage (to keep out mosquitos), etc. It is funny how it was so new to me yet I miss it b/c it was part of his life that he left behind. Probably sounds odd.

He was incredible that first day (and has been every day since). His ears were so badly infected and both front teeth were about to come up but he was just happy and content. He smiled a lot but it took him 2 weeks before he laughed for us. He never cried even when he hit his head hard. He was just content, a fighter, a survivor.

It is a day to remember. Such a happy, joyous day. The day we held our son in our arms. Thank you God for BT. He is a true blessing.

As I was proofing this BT came in and saw the picture of Andrew holding him. He immediately said "Daddy." It was just interesting to me since I had typed about how he looked at us trying to figure us out then and now how he knows who we are.

I'll try and write some more about the next few days. They are not as exciting but we still had fun! I might wrap them up in one post. I'll see. I am losing stamina :) Off to fold laundry.

Day 6 - One day away

2010-02-16T06:45:00.000-08:00

So on Monday we woke up and had breakfast and then went shopping. There were these hats that we saw on men only in Alaba. We wanted one but were told we would not be able to find one. But guess what - we did! We have a hat that is specific to Alaba. We were told they were called barnetta (sp?) but we found out that barnetta just means hat. We also had mosquito nets in our room and b/c we went to Awasa we had to take malaria medication. Andrew & I never saw mosquitos though. Andrew collects daggers and swords and we bought a dagger from Ethiopia to give to BT one day. We then went to a Ethiopian market not for tourist and bought coffee beans.

After shopping we went and had lunch and then headed back. Now the road you take to Awasa is the same road that you take to get to Kenya and Al told us that the highway we were on had a nickname (which I forgot) but it was b/c so many car accidents and deaths occur on it. He says you don't want to drive it at dark and that morning the shop owner where we were shopping was in a car accident and passed away on this highway. We stopped to look at this one lake. Kids just see white people in the car and start running by it. Al said that they learn as soon as they can walk to run next to cars to try and get money. It was scary seeing children run so close to a moving car. We walked around the lake and then headed back. At the entrance to the lake there were children selling this sand statues. M & I wanted to buy one so we stopped even though Al said they would fall apart (mine has made it through 2 moves and is still together). Al said to not pay more then 5 birr but the children wanted 20 birr. We were surrounded instantly. Andrew just laughed as I tried to negotiate with these children. I remember their teeth. They all had such decaying teeth. Finally this beautiful little girl sold me her statue.

We continued back to Addis. We stopped again right near BT's orphanage to grab a drink and fill out paper work. M & I got in trouble b/c we did not bring the check list for paperwork. But we both had the exact same thing so we felt like we were okay. Then we headed back to Addis, rechecked in to our room, and then went out to dinner. Tomorrow was a big day. As I type it I remember how I felt knowing tomorrow was the day I would hold my son. Even right now my heart is pounding with excitement.

Day 5 - Hippos, Parks, and Houses

2010-02-15T05:35:00.000-08:00

So, day 5 started w/ M and myself being sick. Andrew was feeling better but me not so much. The men went and had breakfast and decided to let us nap and then at lunch time we would go and see the hippos. So, I rested and skipped lunch and then we headed out to see the hippos. Now, everyone has talked about the hippo boats and how scary they are but I have to say I did not find it scary at all. Water did come in but I never felt like the boat was going to sink. There was an Ethiopian flag waving on the boat and it is a cool image that remains in my mind of it waving in the wind. We drove (is that the right word?) for a while and then finally got to a place where we saw hippos. So cool. I wanted to go closer but we never did. I am sure it is for safety reasons (Andrew tells me that hippos are very aggressive and cause more deaths to human then any other animal). Luckily we had purchased a super nice camera for the trip so I was able to get some good pics. We headed back and saw these fishermen. The lengths of their nets were incredible. I can't believe they can fish and not get their nets super tangled.

When we were done with the boat ride we head to a park to see monkeys, birds, etc. As we drove around Awasa we saw lots of weddings. It was almost lent and since Ethiopian Orthodox fast during Lent there are lots of weddings right before. So, we pull in to this park and we stop to pay. Next thing we know a man with a huge gun is staring at Andrew. We move on and Al starts to laugh. He told them Andrew was Ethiopian so that he did not have to pay. He said if they ask just to say he was Ethiopian who was raised in the US. We get out of the van and there are these huge birds. Kids swarm us and start throwing fish at the birds. Bigger boys push away smaller boys to do this. After we watch for a while we walk through the park to see the monkeys. This one boy follows us the whole time and feeds the monkeys cookies to bring them out. He is resilient and stays with us the rest of the way. We saw a monkey with its baby. Then we leave.

We drop M off b/c she is not feeling well and leave Awasa to drive around. I loved this drive. It was gorgeous. Al ask if we want to see someone's house. We say yes, so he stops. I ask if he knows them and he says he will tell them we are family visiting :) He says no. He just stops and ask some strangers can see their house and they say yes. So we go in to these peoples' home. It is a big circular house that they share with the live stock. The grounds are uneven and there is animal poop on the floor. There is a section for sleeping and one for cooking. Then they take us outside to show us their crops. Now, could you imagine having someone stop and ask if they can see your house and then just letting them go in. It was incredible. By the time we were done there were a ton of folks outside as they had seen/heard that we stopped. This drive was breath taking. Now one thing about Ethiopia is the driving. Cars have the right away and just honk at you and you know to move over. I was scared every time I saw a child on the side of the road. They stayed out of the street but I was always worried they would run in the street. We passed these 3 children on the road out and they just waved at us when they saw our van. So cool.

We did not do much that night. I was starting to feel better which was nice yet the emotions of meeting B's momma were still with us. It has never left. I wish I could write her and keep in touch with her. I wonder what she is doing and how her days are. It was nice having a light day after such an emotional one. Tomorrow is Monday and we head back to Addis and in two days we will hold our sweet boy in our arms! The emotions of where we were last year overcame me and Logan's Valentine's party. I had to stop myself from breaking down and crying.

Today, as in almost everyday, I thanked God for allowing us to adopt and be BT's parents. What a blessing he is to our family.

Day 4 - A day to remember

2010-02-14T14:16:00.000-08:00

We woke up early today to head down South. We left our bags at our hotel and took only one smaller suitcases for the trip and our donations to the orphanage our agency works w/ down south in Awasa. Then we headed out. The next thing I know we are turning and I am wondering where we are going. It was a cemetery and we were going to Zinabu's grave site. As I sit here and write it tears fill my eyes. I miss him. We pulled up and walked back and there was where our little sweet precious boy was put to rest. There had been a picture of him on the gravesite but it has faded. It list us as his Mom and Dad. We begin to cry. We pray. We grieve. I always think of his birth Mom and how she gave him up for a better life and how he never made it. I hurt for her still and wonder if she knows and how she is doing. Soon it is time to go as we need to get on the road. My children still ask why he had to die. We still struggle with an answer. He is forever with us.

We drive and pick up the driver and then head out. I am the tallest in the group so I get the front seat (and I had just had foot surgery so there is more foot room up there). Seems like a win but the exhaust in Ethiopia is so bad and sitting in the front seat you seem to get the brunt of it as there is no ac in the car so the windows are open. We hear Church bells for an Ethiopian Orthodox Church ringing as we put gas in the car.

We drive pass Debre Zeit which is where Tsedeke is and we are so close to him. The longing that fills me to hold him. We start to drive South and stop b/c camels are crossing the road.

We see our first Baobob tree which B&M had wanted to see and as we drive by I try and take a picture.

We stop for breakfast and Andrew & I both get french toast and I try a mochiato (sp?).

I should note that Andrew is feeling horrible so he sleeps for most of the drive.

We stop at some point to get a soda and because M and I have to use the potty. We ask where it is and a man shows us outside and talks us along to the back. There is a hole in the floor. Just a hole for us to squat and go in. Luckily another man comes up and takes us inside and shows us to restrooms w/ commodes. We were both thankful. We have our soda and continue on the drive. Then we turn off the road to Awasa and head to Alaba. We stop at a hotel/restaurant and Al introduces us to "the mayor". He then laughs (he loves telling jokes) and introduces us to the man whom people bring their children to when they want to give them up for adoption. We go have lunch. Andrew is too sick to eat and orders spaghetti. M and I order shiru and it is okay but not as good as the night before. "The Mayor" eats raw meat. Just a chunk of raw meat and his pocket knife.

Then they say it is time to go and they say we are heading to meet Tsedeke's mother first. Excitement, fear, joy, sadness floods my body. We drive and arrive at her house. She shows up a few minutes later and we go inside. She is beautiful. Tsedeke looks like her. We sit down and ask question after question. At some point Al says "white people ask lots of questions :) ". What we learned from her will be shared with BT when he is older. I can say it was hard and so incredible. When we were done we went to hug and in watching the video the whole room gets quiet as her and I embrace and cry in each others arms. I did not want to leave. I wanted to stay and be part of her world for a lot longer. She never leaves my mind. We pray for her often and when I see her picture hanging up in our (hers and mine) son's room I am so overcome w/ a mix of emotions. I have tried to send pictures over and hope she has received them so she can see how BT is doing.

Then we left and I kept looking back. Your mind is overwhelmed with the whole experience. We then headed to Awasa. We stopped along the way and picked up a rock so I would have one from Alaba but in the move out here I have lost/misplaced it :(

We arrived at the orphanage in Awasa. It was incredible. We held so many babies and played with so many children. They were all bare bottomed b/c diapers are expensive. There was this one little boy who I was thinking about yesterday who I wondered if he made it. I have never seen a child so small. We weighed the children. The scales were so off. M would stand on it and take her weight and then we would give her a child and the weight would go down. So they went to buy a new scale and we weighed and measured the children and then took pictures. We were able to hold and get video for several families from our agency. One family I still follow their blog and it is so fun seeing how their little girl (who the nannies loved so much they did not want to let me hold her) has grown and blossomed. She is truly adorable.

Then we went and checked in to our hotel and went for dinner. Andrew was still feeling horrible. We went to this pizza place where they carve (is that the right word?) the goat right in front of you and then fry it up in a 3 foot pan filled with oil over a fire. I forget what I got. It started to rain. An Ethiopian man goes by us and says "Zinabu". Zinabu means rain. To hear our son's name. We ended up leaving b/c of the rain.

We went back to our hotel. Andrew feel asleep. I stayed up and watched one of the "Lord of the Rings" DVDs on my laptop and wrote in my journal for that night. I also got sick from the shiru that night (as did M).

Today was a day that wiped me out emotionally. This is a day that will remain etched in my mind forever.

Day 3 - Compassion, Shopping, and a Traditional Ethiopian Meal

2010-02-13T07:10:00.000-08:00

Today was our first full day in Ethiopia. If I remember right, we both slept well. We had to be up fairly early as our contact from Compassion International was coming to take us to meet our sponsor child, Samuel. Once they arrived we headed off to the Church that Compassion works with to help children in Addis. Our contact kept telling us that these were the poor of the poor. Our contacts name was Joseph and he was super nice and helpful. We arrived at the Church and our car was immediately swarmed by children. They all just came up to us and said Jesus. We then went and met the lady in charge and she told us about the program, etc. Then it was finally time to go meet Samuel. We headed off to find his house but they were having trouble finding it b/c his family had moved. They move anytime they find cheaper rent. We walked along a side walk (I guess that what it is) between houses to get to his. His house was a room about 12 x 12. That is where all 6 members of his family lived. I remember there was dog outside just barking. I am a little scared of dogs and it did scare me but the children just walked by this growling barking dog like it was nothing. We met with Samuel and his family. We were overwhelmed. We were so thankful we could help this family out. I will never forget how Samuel's mother kept almost bowing to us and how overjoyed she was with sheets and towels we brought her or the look on Samuel's face when we gave him new shoes. If I had known the impact of shoes I would have brought several more pairs. Andrew prayed before we left and Joseph translated. We left and the lollipops we had given to Samuel had already been handed out to kids outside. One boy was waiting outside the door and he was maybe 7 and he was holding his baby sister/brother on his back.

Then we drove back to the hotel and waited for B&M and then went and had lunch. Then we went shopping. Now, we were told to never pay what we are told but to offer lower. This was hard for me. We did a lot of shopping but now that we are here I wish we had bought more. Andrew kept saying we were moving and that our house would be almost 1/2 the size of our current house so that we would not have room. But we did buy a lot.

Then we went home and I told Al that we had not received Tsedeke's ticket when we went to check in w/ Ethiopian Air. He said we needed to get that done so instead of napping like we wanted to we drove back to the Hilton to get his boarding pass (for some reason we forgot some paperwork and they were not able to pull up his ticket but they could for B&M). Then we went back and headed out to the traditional Ethiopian diner. This was incredible. The food was great. There was this one meat dish that rocked. I also liked the sheru from the Fasting Plate that Al and M had. The Orthodox fast (don't eat meat or dairy products) on Friday ( and I believe Wed.) as well as during lent. We then watched 6 dancers. They were incredible and their stamina. I have video just need to figure out how to upoad. We had the traditional coffee ceremony as well as a honey wine (I think) that was not good at all. Then we headed home. We had to be up early to head out on Saturday. Saturday would be an incredibly emotional day for us.

Day 2 - We arrive

2010-02-12T08:41:00.000-08:00

After a long, but not too bad flight we finally arrived in Addis! I was awake to see the sunrise.

Oh, the excitement to know we are in the country of our sons births.

We were able to get through the visa line fairly quickly and then went to exchange our dollars to birr (exchange rate 1 to 11). Then we went to claim our luggage and had to get in another line to leave the airport. I was in front and folks kept pushing in front of me and I let them as I did not want to be rude, but finally I realized I would have to push ahead or we would be stuck in this line w/ all of our luggage all night.

I was wondering how we would know who Al (our contact in Ethiopia) was. But we were the 3 white and 1 Indian traveler on the plane and we did send pictures over w/ our dossier. But he knew exactly who we were and took us to a van. Even though we were only 2 families we had a TON of luggage. We had to load it on top of the van. We went to our hotel (the Sadula Lodge) and then went to a restaurant called Green View were we had vegetarian pizza. It was very good. It said green peppers and I was expecting bell peppers but they were more like jalepeno peppers but luckily we like some spice to our food (and our life :) ).

Then we headed back to the hotel and started sorting through stuff for tomorrow we would meet Samuel (the child we sponsor through Compassion) and go shopping.

Now, the bed was hard and I mean hard. I was reading what I wrote in our journal and I said I did not even care b/c I was so beat but they are hard.

Day 1 - Travel

2010-02-10T22:08:00.000-08:00

So, one year ago we left L&K for 10 days (which is the longest we had ever left them for). They stayed at home w/ my Mom and Dad. Each day we were gone we had a note for them telling them what we were doing and a little gift (they varied from fruit snacks to books to poster board and paint to make B's welcome home sign).

We had 6 bags which each weighed between 50 and 51 lbs. We arrived at the airport extra early to weigh and redistribute things.

It was so hard to leave L&K but so exciting to finally be on our way to Ethiopia. Look how young they look.

We flew to DC where we met up w/ Monica and Brad. We had dinner and then went to check in at Ethiopian Air. They weigh your carry ons and they can't be more the 20 lbs. Ours (we each had 2) were both over. So we stuffed things in our jackets. Then after we had our carry ons weighed and got our boarding passes we put things back in the suitcases. But when we went to board they were weighing the bags again so we had to stuff our pockets back full of stuff.

Then the long flight continues and I'll show us arriving in Ethiopia on the 12th w/ all of our luggage.

Remembering our time in Ethiopia

2010-02-09T14:20:00.000-08:00

One year ago from Thursday we left for Ethiopia. I never really posted much of our trip so I am going to try and post what we were doing a year ago day by day. That way we can share the joys and beauty of our trip to Ethiopia.

And as for BT's life book. I meant to have it done by the day we first held him but that is in 8 days and I'm thinking I won't make it. I am close but I started reading Harry Potter to the kids and got sucked in and had to read all 7 in a row and that was time consuming. But I hope to be done by end of the month????

So here is us packing in what would be BT's room for 2 weeks before the movers came and moved us across the country.

So here is us trying to pack.

Happy Birthday Hubby, Natural High, and Such a Proud Mommy!

2010-02-02T20:11:00.000-08:00

So, tomorrow is my husband's birthday. I am so excited for him! We love celebrating birthdays in our house. Happy Birthday wonderful husband of mine!

Sunday we went out on a date - just the 2 of us! Now, I know for some a date with their husband is a common occurrence but for us, during the last year, it has been rare. At first we did not leave BT b/c of bonding. Then we did not leave him b/c we were new to CA and did not have a sitter. Then we did not leave him b/c he got upset if we tried to leave him (we have tried for a few months now at Church w/ no such luck). But this Sunday we decided to do a babysitting swap with some new friends of ours who also have 3 kids. We got to go first. We felt like BT would do well b/c he was with L&K and we were right. He went right in to play and did great! Andrew & I left and had a marvelous time. We saw "Avatar" and went to dinner. We both left feeling uplifted. It was a natural high. What a marvelous time I had just w/ my incredible hubby!

And now why I am a proud Mommy! Yesterday at school one of L's friends fell down and hit some kids and the kids were so upset and started being mean to L's friend. First off, this really hurt him b/c he did not like seeing boys being mean to his friend and secondly b/c these boys were not forgiving his friend. L talked about how they needed to know about forgiveness. So today he brought his Bible to school and read a part about forgiveness to one of the boys who would not forgive his friend.

Now to go work on our year post adoption report!

Look how I've grown

2010-01-25T09:46:00.000-08:00

We were not with BT last Christmas but we celebrated with him once he came back. I bought these ridiculously big stockings and here was BT last Feb. and then right after Christmas.

Finally - legally our son

2010-01-14T13:49:00.000-08:00

One year ago today we finally passed court in Ethiopia and Brandon Tsedeke legally became our son. The journey through court was so long and exhausting and after all the other heart ache we had experienced we were feeling defeated yet hopeful that the 3rd time would be a charm.

After it took 2 days to tell us we did not pass court the 1st time and a not so pleasant conversation with a worker at our adoption agency I informed them that I would no longer be the point of contact and that Andrew would. I was to the point where I could no longer take a phone call with bad news (and they always seemed to happen when Andrew was out of town or working super late and I had to deal with it all by myself). So, from then on out they emailed and called Andrew. He got the updated pics and medical and he also go the call that we did not pass court the 2nd time. I was so upset after not passing the first time that I did not even find out when our second court date, but I knew that we did not pass when I saw a look of sadness and hurt that I had not seen on my husband's face before. I did find out the date for our 3rd court hearing. It was almost a month out.

So, finally one year ago today I knew a call would be coming with hopefully good news. (I had noticed that the passing calls came earlier in the afternoon and the not passing calls came later in the afternoon. ) It was around 1 o'clock I believe and our home phone rang. I went to answer it and the caller idea said Adoption Associates. I answered even though I knew they were to call Andrew on his cel. I answered so timidily and our contact said "hi, its good news". I began to cry and Kendra kept asking me why I was crying. I kept saying they are tears of happiness. I immediately started asking about travel dates because we had to be out in CA in 2 months. From there our life was a whirl wind with selling our house, traveling to Ethiopia and moving across the country. But what a joy to finally be able to share his picture with others and to tell the world he is officially our son!

People always said you forget the hardships of adoption when you bring your child home. I have not but I don't dwell on them anymore. The journey was worth it and in the end we are stronger b/c of it but I have not forgotten (but I think that is okay).

So happy officially passing court anniversary to us!

Neighbors

2010-01-13T16:53:00.000-08:00

So, today I have my neighbors 2 youngest kids at my house running around with light sabers with my 3 children.

When we moved to CA we first lived in a home for 5 months. We never saw kids outside. It was sad and rather lonely for us as we were used to kids out on the street all the time. Then in August we moved again and ended up with a bunch of great neighbors and best of all our next door neighbors had kids and 2 out of their 3 were the same age and gender as 2 or ours. Such a blessing and our kids all get along and truly enjoy playing together.

In NC we had the best neighbors. I mean our street was incredible. I could not have asked for anything better and it was hard in our first house in CA not having what we had in NC. When we decided to move we wanted to find something like we had in NC and even though this street is very different then what we had in NC we have some great neighbors and it is so nice.

Heart breaking - Role Models

2009-12-22T07:42:00.000-08:00

So I have had a hard weekend as have many people. Why because sometimes someone you respect and look up to messes up big time and this weekend we found out that someone we respect messed up big time. And it hurts. And you cry. And you ask why. And you hope and pray that reconciliation and forgiveness can come.

I have been thinking a lot about role models since the whole Tiger Woods thing came out. I was thinking about all the people who look up to him and how they probably feel let down. I have also thought of the unimaginable pain he has caused his wife and I can not imagine.

The verse that came to my mind is: And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to go into hell. - Matthew 5:30.
And I realized I need to make sure that if something in my life is causing me to sin that I MUST get rid of it.

But when the whole thing came out I was like that is why folks should not have sports/famous people as role models. Because they are in a position of power and with that comes temptations that I am glad I do not have to face. I thought that is why parents, relatives, family friends, Church members should be role models. Then it got me thinking that why that sounds good in my head it is not a lot of children's reality. A lot of children do not have a Mom, Dad, Uncle, Pastor in their life to be a role model. So who becomes these children's role models. I sadly realized that for most of these children it would be someone famous. And if I was going to be all high and mighty then I should start volunteering to be a mentor (someone who guides them) .

Then came this weekend and someone who I would have said should be a role model let thousands of people down. So much sadness, disappointment, anger, confusion, grief. This is a person I would have said look up to him. Yet, Satan found a way in. Was he a great mentor and did he bear much fruit, 100% definitely.

So, who should be a role model? I think it is okay to admire someone for their skill - golf, teaching, acting and take enjoyment in the fruits of their labor but we should not strive to be like anyone but Jesus. He is the only person who has walked this earth with out sin. All role models will sin. We are sinful beings. Thank you Jesus for your grace and forgiveness.

So if you are out there please pray for these children and adults who need someone to look up to. That they find someone to inspire them but they let Jesus be their moral compass. And pray for those hurting from this weekend.

The LORD is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit. - Psalm 34:18

Trip to NC & Memories of our trip to Ethiopia

2009-12-17T15:34:00.000-08:00

So, I just returned from a solo trip to NC. After my surgery I was in the house all the time and started missing people, especially my friends in NC. So I asked my husband if I could go and he said yes!! I was so excited. I planned the trip around a Christmas MNO that I have attended with 5 other girls for the past 4 or so years and a small group Christmas party we have had since Logan was first born.

I had such a great time. It was so hard leaving as Kendra cried and cried. A hour later she was still crying and I started feeling guilty. My husband told me that if I felt bad the whole trip then me going was a waste. Luckily, the next time I talked to her she was much better and once I arrived in NC and saw my friends and their daughters (who cried when they saw me) I felt better and remembered that I came to spend some quality time with some great people.

I was able to see a ton of people (just a few folks I did not get to catch up with). I laughed and laughed at our small group Christmas party. Just funny stuff. So good to laugh with a big group of people.

On the way to Raleigh I flew threw DC. The last time I flew in and out of DC was in February when we brought B home. It brought back so many memories, especially when I passed Ethiopian Air. When I arrived in Raleigh I remembered walking through the same terminal with this little baby boy in tow and crying as I rounded the corner to see L&K and the rest of our family and friends. What a great memory to relive :)

I think one amazing part of the trip was how comfortable it was being with my friends. I have not seen them in 9 months but it was like I had just seen them yesterday.

It was good to get home and see the 3 kiddos and Andrew. He did an amazing job and the house was even clean! So thankful for a husband who knew how much I needed this trip and was willing to take time off so I could go. Thanks wonderful husband.

Friends in NC - love ya' and miss ya' already. Maybe HQ's for Andrew's job will change to Raleigh and we can move back :) I did pull a flyer for Andrew to remind him how affordable Raleigh is. And I did look throw the window of our old house (they have made lots of changes and I like all of them except the new back splash in the kitchen).

Have a great Thursday. The weather is beautiful here in CA :)

1/2 of his life

2009-12-04T13:12:00.000-08:00

Well, today marks a very exciting day. We have officially had Brandon Tsedeke for 1/2 of his life. This means for 1/2 of his life he has woken up and seen our faces there loving him, we have been the ones to meet all his needs, and he has been there to brighten our lives with his adorably charming smile and personality.

Now, I had built this day up in my head for a long time. I felt like it would be such a big deal when we have had him for over 1/2 of his life. And it is exciting to know that he has been with us longer then anyone else but....

I have found that I don't count the days or months that he has been with us anymore. I know on Feb. 17, 2010 that I will celebrate the anniversary of the day I finally held him in my arms (I held him in my heart for much longer) and that on February 21 that we will celebrate family day as this is the day we all came together as a family of 5, but ....

I just don't thing of it in terms of how long he has been with us. He just is part of our family and really I don't think much beyond that. Life is so much better with him in it (and more challenging b/c man he is in to everything).

So, now off to work on his life book. I am good at it and then I stop but my goal is to have it done by February 2010 so I'd better get going.

Christmas Tree Sell Out

2009-12-02T08:43:00.000-08:00

So, I heard on the news that mom and pop Christmas tree places are going out of business because places like Home Depot are now selling trees.

I decided I would go to a local place. The news said the trees were about 5 dollars more at these mom and pop places. So we went. For a 6-7 ft. tree they wanted 73 dollars (or 79). So we said, well lets go to Home Depot and see. The same 6-7 ft. tree was 40 and I had a 10 dollar off coupon to Ace Hardware that they would take.

So, I went with the cheaper tree (by over half) and ordered pizza for dinner that night and it still was cheaper then a tree at the mom and pop place.

I feel bad but that is a lot more money - not just 5 dollars.

Next year we are driving in to the mountains to cut one down.

Pics of decorating our tree soon. I am slow and getting pics downloaded.

Wow, thanks to our parents

2009-11-19T14:07:00.000-08:00

Well, 4 weeks and 1 day ago I had my 2nd surgery on my achilles in the last 10 months.

Last time I took it easy for about 3 or 4 days and then was up and doing things non stop.

This time we decided I would take it easy so it would get better so I don't have to do this again and so
that it gets well enough not to rupture.

So, my Mom came followed by Andrew's folks.

For 4 1/2 weeks I have had another adult or more in my house. Now, the help is SO incredibly nice but I am a control freak and like doing things my way. I was worried if I would go crazy. I have had some stir crazy days where I needed to get out of the house and days I wanted to take back control over my house hold (since it is my job and it is hard letting others do your job) but overall it has gone great. I prayed and prayed about this and I am so thankful that God answered my prayers on this in so many ways!

I had a great time with my Mom and my in-laws and the help they provided was incredible and for it Andrew &; I are so grateful. All 3 of them did so much to help make our lives easier while I laid around. They cooked, cleaned, carted my children around, tried to keep up with Brandon Tsedeke, etc.

We are so lucky to have parents that were willing to come out and help for over 2 weeks each. My Dad had it easy as he had to work so he stayed at home but when he retires and comes to visit I'll have a to do list for him. :)

I've never seen my Mom look so tired. She went and went and went. So did Andrew's folks.

But they got to know their grandchildren better and that is more valuable then anything they did out here. Each enjoyed their walks to and from school with Logan. Each enjoyed special walks with Brandon after dropping Logan off, time reading to Kendra and listening to her talk non-stop. Kendra and my MIL are best buds. Last night before they left Kendra came crying into the room and jumped in Grandma's lap to tell her she did not want her to go.

Thanks Mamaw, Grandpa, and Grandma! How lucky are we to be blessed with such wonderful parents! We love you all!

Absolutely Incredible - The Difference Compassion Can Make

2009-11-13T10:58:00.000-08:00

Hi all,

This is an incredible video about the difference a Compassion sponsor made in a young man's life. Watch his reaction as he meets him for the 1st time. We think we can't make a difference, but oh we can. Have you thought of sponsoring a child? It is 35 / month. That is less then one time eating out a month. Is there a country that you has a special place in your heart. If so, see if you can sponsor a child there. We picked two countries that are dear to our hearts - Ethiopia and India.

Go here (http://www.vimeo.com/7072300).

I hope you watch this video and have tissues near by.

Hair

2009-11-11T08:45:00.007-08:00

So, I love Brandon Tsedeke's hair. I think it is so incredibly cute. I am waiting for it to grow in on the sides. It was shaved when he was 4 1/2 - 5 months old and has grown in on the top and back but not on the sides. It is finally starting to grow in on the sides but it is still straight. When we finally held him in our arms for the first time last February, I was amazed at how straight his hair was. As it has grown it has become curly. The back is a tighter curl and the top is a bigger, loser curls.

When we decided to adopt fro Ethiopia my sister told me that I needed to know how to do African hair. Now, folks may think it is easy because I have a boy and I think it is easier but we are growing it out so it is not super easy. I try to read on the best ways to do his hair. I use Carol's Daughter product right now. There is a boy in Logan's class and I love his hair. He is what I hope I can do to BT's hair. He is 6 and has had one hair cut to trim it up. His curls are incredible and it is just so stinkin' cute. His mom uses mixed chicks. I may try this product when I am out of Carol's Daughter to see what I like better.

But for right now I refuse to cut his hair. We have good hair days and bad hair days and he does not love having it combed (but Kendra did not like having her hair combed at 18 months either).

I wash,condition, and brush his hair on Sundays. Since I have not been able to bathe them Andrew has been doing it. He was washing and conditioning but I could not understand why his hair looked so bad. Then I realized I had forgot to tell him to brush it. Oops. So the next time he had conditioner in his hair he brushed it out and it looked so much better.

BT does not like his hair brushed. With conditioner in it it actually brushes pretty easy but I need to keep him distracted to do it. I know I could cut it and it would be easier but I refuse. I just love it. It is just too cute!

It is funny because in his referral pic he was completely bald. When L&K see that pic they often think it is Zinabu b/c they are used to seeing BT with hair.

I have also struggled with Kendra's hair. It is super long and there are times she wants to cut it (mainly when others are getting their hair cut and she feels left out) but I tell her she has to tell me for a whole month before we will cut it. And I really don't want to because I think her hair so so long and beautiful. I have told her to have long hair she has to let me brush it. It used to be a battle but now she is good with letting me brush it and understands she needs to condition it so it brushes easier. Right now she only wants to wear it in a pony tail so she can pull it tight. It used to be only in a braid. It is fun because it is so long we can do so many things with it when she lets us.

So here is a pic of BT's curls. Aren't they super cute. There are also 2 pics of his hair from last February. And a picture of a pumpkin we saw why trick or treating. Pretty impressive.

Happy Halloween

2009-11-09T10:32:00.003-08:00

Hi, I know it is past time but I finally got pics downloaded from Halloween.

So, about our costumes.
1st - Brandon was the only one who got a new one.
2nd - L&K had to use a costume from our dress up clothes.
3rd - L&K suckered my Mom in to buying face paint for them.
4th - Logan wanted to be something scary and I did not feel like 6 was an appropriate age to be something scary.
5th - Andrew & I had to sell the idea of reusing costumes and came up with the story that Logan would be a helicopter pilot and wear his authentic fighter pilot suit (his thank you gift for being in my cousin Kate's wedding) and he had been shot down and killed. He came back as a zombie.
6th - Even though I was against them being something scary I painted their faces as a zombie and Kendra as a vampire (she was a ballerina vampire riding a unicorn pegasus).

Anyway, Happy November. My in-laws are here and we are having a great time. I am off of crutches. I was on crutches during Halloween so my sweet husband surprised me with a wheel chair so I could go trick or treating :) So nice. And I never posted but I had surgery on my Achilles and calf for the second time.

Too Small To Ignore

2009-11-03T06:10:00.005-08:00

So, I started reading the book "Too Small To Ignore - Why the Least of These Matter" by Dr. Wes Stafford. He is the President and CEO of Compassion International. We, as a family, sponsor 2 children through Compassion International. Our little boy is a 6 year old boy who lives in Addis Ababa, Ethiopia. Our little girl is a 9 year old girl who lives in India.

When I first wanted to sponsor a child Andrew was not super thrilled. He let me do it but his heart was not in it. Fast forward 1 1/2 years to the day we met Samuel - our beautiful little boy in Addis Ababa. Andrew totally believes in Compassion and what it is doing. Why, because it makes a difference. We saw the light in his eyes. The love and gratitude in his parents face and their expressions of love towards us. Why, because we saw poverty (he is the poor of the poor) and realized we need to make a difference and that the money we give monthly is making a difference in this family. Because they were saving money we had given Samuel to a time when they needed it and this is as they (a family of 6) lived in a maybe 10 x 10 room. Below are pics of us with our sweet Samuel. Don't you love his smile. We love him and pray for him nightly!

I just started reading this book but the beginning of it got to me so I wanted to share.

Late one evening D.L. Moody, the premier American evangelist of the 1800s, arrived home from speaking at a meeting. Emma, his wife, was already asleep. As her exhausted husband climbed into bed, she rolled over and murmured, "So how did it go tonight?"

"Pretty well," he replied. "Two and a half coverts."

His wife lay silently for a moment pondering this response, then finally smiled. "That's sweet," she replied. "How old was the child?"

"No, no, no," Moody answered. "It was two children and one adult! The children have their whole lives in front of them. The adult's life is already half-gone."

We are called to help the least of these. They should not be forgotten. What can you do to make a difference? There are so many ways. It can even be seeing a child and smiling and confirming their worth. It can be sponsoring a child through Compassion. It can be whatever will make a difference! So come one - help make a difference in the life of a child.

Pumpkin Patches and Such

2009-10-27T08:19:00.007-07:00

So, we have gone to 2 pumpkin patches as a family (Logan also went to one for his school field trip). The first one was in Half Moon Bay and it was cool but super expensive. Logan and Kendra rode ponies and Brandon Tsedeke did a train ride. We also did a super cool corn maze. We then went to hang out with some other Ethiopian adoptive families on the beach which was a lot of fun.

The next weekend we went up to Petaluma and went to the coolest pumpkin patch. It was out on a farm and it was incredible. It was gorgeous and affordable (unlike Half Moon Bay). We were there several hours. We dug for potatoes, milked a cow, climbed hay stacks, saw animals, did a corn maze, sat in old horse drawn carriages, went on a hay ride, went on a horse drawn carriage, ate pumpkin ice cream, and picked our pumpkins from the vine. Logan picked a huge pumpkin. Brandon liked to throw the pumpkins. Kendra took a long time finding the perfect pumpkin.

It was so much fun. We followed up that day by going to the beach and playing. It was just one of those days that rock.

Here are some recent pics

I must look like his mother

2009-10-10T11:55:00.003-07:00

So last week we were in the mall, standing there all 5 of us together looking like one very happy cute family. I was holding B. An African American lady walked by us and B waved (he waves to everyone). She looked at us and then to her friends and said "I must look like his mom."

Now, how do you react to this? I just looked at L & K and said "She is silly, she does not look like me."

I think I was surprised but Andrew was a little annoyed. A we walked on we ran into another African American lady and she was like "what a lovely family you have." This made us feel great. We do have a beautiful family.

In NC there was a lady who went to our Church who had triplets. She was from Trinidad and had a similar coloring to Andrew. Her triplets were all blond. Folks always came up to her and said "Wow, you are a nanny for triplets."

I think folks should assume the child is with their mother and refer to the woman holding, playing with the child as the Mommy. If they are wrong, the nanny can always correct them.

But I know I have said dumb things too. I just wish folks would think about how their comments might effect the children who are hearing it. Me, I can handle it. I do think I responded in a way that was positive for L&K (B is too young to get it).

Enjoy your weekend. It is beautiful weather here in CA.

Unexplained, Explained

2009-10-08T12:21:00.002-07:00

Sometimes I think back to the years Andrew & I tried for our 3rd child. After struggling we were finally diagnosed with unexplained secondary infertility. There is no medical reason why we could not get pregnant.

Then I look at my precious son and I am like okay, it is explained. We could not have another child because our sons were not supposed to come from my womb. God had a different plan in store for us. A path I am pretty sure we would not have taken unless we went through the struggles of trying to have a 3rd child.

After Kendra was born I did not feel like our family was complete. We started trying for a 3rd pretty soon after she was born. When the months turned in to a year plus it was heart breaking b/c I felt like we were not done and did not understand why God placed this desire on my heart yet was not allowing it to happen.

If Andrew and I had not been able to conceive a 2nd child I know adoption or infertility would have been something we pursued because we wanted Logan to have a brother or a sister but we had 2 and Logan and Kendra had each other. Andrew felt like he could be done yet this feeling that our family was not complete remained.

This is where I see God's hand come in to play. The desire for another one is really what pushed us towards adoption. The fact that this desire would not go away and I was not willing to give up on having another child.

His plan was to build our family in His own unique and special way.

Now, I feel done. Sure, at times I would like another child to hold, to breast feed, to snuggle with, but our family feels complete now. That longing for another one is almost gone (well, for Andrew it is completely gone - he is done w/ 3, unless God has other plans in store for us).

Before I used to wish God had put the call to adopt on our hearts in a much easier way but then I look at where we are now and how we have grown and I am so thankful for the valley we journeyed through.

I am so thankful we were not able to conceive after Kendra. I am thankful we were able to conceive and have our precious Logan and Kendra.

My kids are incredible. What a precious gift and how lucky are we that we get to be there Mommy and Daddy.

Referraliversary

2009-10-01T06:46:00.003-07:00

One year ago, at 3:08* I received a call from our agency. I was expecting a call because I had asked them to call and they had emailed me so I called and got voicemail and said please call me. Like I said in my last post Andrew and I were not for sure what to do as referrals were not coming and we had to move and we did not want to start the whole USCIS process again in CA. After Zinabu passed away and we went back on the list we said we were still open to either gender and were told we were first in line for boy or girl. I have to say this was hard for me because I knew many had been waiting longer then us for a girl. I went back and forth with Andrew about if this was right and in the end I decided to just let our agency make that call. We never imagined it would be almost 3 months till we got our next referral.

But one year ago the day finally came. I never posted about this since I shared our referral with very few people. But I was in my car on the way home from a play date when they called. Before I was even able to start saying anything our contact from our agency said "I have some news. I have a referral." She tried to say his name and then said it was a boy and then spelled his name. She said it has been coming but they did not want to say anything till it was complete but if the information had not come in they were going to tell us anyway. She gave me all the information about our little boy. I was shaking again. I was so happy. I started calling Andrew and he was in a meeting but I did not care. I kept calling and calling until he answered. Finally he did and I told him we had another son. Of course, when I finally get a hold of him, Kendra throws a toy spider out the window and is crying for me to go back so it was hard to talk to him. I told him I would pick up Logan from the bus stop and we would come and look at his picture together. Well, when I got home I checked my email and there was one with Tsedeke in the title. I wanted to look but didn't. I called my friend Beth and cancelled our play date. I had cancelled before w/ her because L was sick and on the day Zinabu died and she asked if everything was okay and I told her it was good and she asked if it was phone call good and I said yes. So we drove to meet Andrew & L&K were too busy drawing on the white board to see what we were doing. We saw his picture and he was so cute. We video taped this only to realize neither of us pressed record. But we showed the kids and they were confused but then we told them who he was and they were so excited.

So here are the 2 pics we saw of our son last year on this wonderful day and one from today when we went apple picking!

*If you are wondering how I knew the exact time, well, I wrote a letter to our sweet son the day we received his referral and the day we passed court. I am so glad I did because there are details of that day that I have forgotten and when I read these letters I get to relive it all over again

One year ago today

2009-09-30T08:39:00.002-07:00

We were at our ropes end with the adoption. I had emailed our agency asking them to call me b/c I needed to talk to them. Of course, I only got an email so I then called but I got voice mail. Andrew and I did not know what to do. We had to be out in CA by March 15 and with no referrals in sight (only promises of soon for the last 2 1/2 + months) we did not know if we could go on with an adoption. In our hearts I don't think we would have given up but we just did not know what to do. We did not want to separate our family either and there had not been a referral for an infant since Zinabu (which was 6/2). We had lost faith in our agency and their ability to have referrals.

I had hoped to have a referral before courts opened but that did not happen. I had spent the Friday before in bed all day crying. Crying over my son who was in Heaven, crying over our next child which I thought would never happen.

But then tomorrow came (more on that tomorrow) and our lives were, again, forever changed!

Blogs for a Cause - Blog Remake

2009-09-27T20:13:00.003-07:00

So, my blog is under going a remake by Nikki Cochrane.

Money is much tighter for our family since moving out to CA and we are trying to save when we can and spend less when we can. Our kids will not get new Halloween costumes (well Brandon is b/c it is his 1st Halloween with us) or new Christmas outfits this year. I actually find that they really don't care too much. I mean I think L&K would both like to get new costumes but we said no and they are fine. I may try and do a costume switch with another friend whose oldest 2 are the same gender and age as mine so the costumes may not be brand new but they will be new to our children.

So, why am I telling you this as I spend money getting my blog redone. Check out Nikki's blog - http://www.madebynikki.blogspot.com/
She is using the money raised from redoing folks blogs (and yes I know you can do them out there for free now) to volunteer in the Dominican Republic. What a great way to help out someone who is serving others. So check out her site and maybe while you are at it get a blog make over.

Next post is thoughts on making B's Life Book!

I am Done :)

2009-09-21T12:59:00.003-07:00

Last Friday we applied for BT's social security number and passport and that completes all adoption paperwork (minus the updates to Ethiopia) that I have to do! It feels so good to be done with it all!

Logan is doing Cub Scouts and spent 2 hours selling popcorn. How stinkin' cute is he (well I can't find the cable to connect the camera to the PC so you will have to wait to see it but boy is he cute)! Andrew said he did great selling the popcorn. He went up to everyone and said "Hi, My name is Logan. I am in Cub Scouts and I am selling popcorn to help my den." Andrew said several folks would walk by and he would go after them and they would come back. He was too cute. I only was there about 10 minutes and I thought he did great. A few folks would walk by w/out looking or acknowledging him. This ticked me off. I wanted to be like "at least give my son the courtesy to look at him and say no." This is why Andrew went and not me.

We went to the beach this Sunday. Ton of fun! We are doing well. Getting involved and doing our best to make CA home.

American Citizen

2009-09-10T19:04:00.002-07:00

BT is officially a citizen of the Unite States of America!

Yeah! We got his certificate of citizenship yesterday in the mail.

Now just on to the SSN and passport! Then I am done except reports
to our adoption agency. :) Yeah and the reports are fun b/c I get to
write about my precious son!

Now on to the life book. My goal is to have it done by our one year anniversary of
having him with us! 5 months to go. I'd better get to work. I just need to find
time and energy.

Brandon and Sword Fighting

2009-09-06T08:27:00.006-07:00

Here are some cute pics of Brandon and Kendra from this a.m. and some videos of BT sword fighting
as well as all of my boys fighting w/ Kendra turning folks in to robots.

"For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways," declares the LORD. Isaiah 55:8

2009-08-13T11:47:00.002-07:00

There are times I look at my son and I am overcome with emotion because to be honest he was not a way I ever thought I would grow my family. When I look at him I am reminded of the years of trying to conceive a 3rd child and the heart ache I had. The mistrust I had in God's plan. Why would he not let us conceive. I often questioned if he thought I was a bad mother - was this why we could not have another child? I went through in my head all the many failures I had as a mother. I could make a list of them. Luckily God was not making that list. He was forgiving me and taking me down a path I never imagined.

Yet in the end, God's plan was perfect. Brandon Tsedeke was so meant to be with us. And the heart ache, well, it has made me and Andrew grow in ways I never imagined. We have grown in our faith and trust in the God we love, we have grown in our marriage (infertility can really take its toll on a couple), and I hope we have grown as individuals.

I feel like Brandon Tsedeke has this special gift, for when I look at him I am reminded why His ways are so much better then my ways. This little boy is a pure joy - we went through a hard valley to get to the mountain. There is no doubt of God's hand in having him be part of our family. Andrew & I know we will enter many more valleys in our lives. I often pray that this time around I will not be so hurt and angry and mistrusting. That I will trust Him (Psalm 147:3 He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds. )

I often wonder if Brandon Tsedeke's momma will ever leave my mind. I truly hope not. She has impacted me beyond belief. I often daydream of the day we will meet her again. How I long for that day. To let her see & hold her son again. To know how she is and what she is doing. I close my eyes and see her smile, her hair and the way she stood.

How I long to be in Ethiopia again and to experience it with our 3 children this time around.

These thoughts have been on my mind for a while now. Just wanted to share. I am totally in love with all 3 of my children.

Mother and Son

2009-08-03T16:15:00.006-07:00

Here are 2 of my favorite pics of Brandon and me.
Well, one is Andrew's favorite and it is from Hawaii. The other is from our camping trip and he is giving me a kiss. Our little boy loves to give kisses. He will just come up and give you some. When you are putting him to bed he will look up, kiss you, then put his head back on you to cuddle. He often repeats this. I love it.

We went to Six Flags yesterday. It was a great family day. Andrew asked if I wanted to ride any roller coasters. I said "no that I had more fun watching the kids." We both talked about how, for us, it is so much fun to watch our kids having a good time. How it will be fun one day to ride the roller coasters with them but for now we will watch their face light up on the tea cups and by seeing their favorite super hero (Green Lantern) and watching a dolphin and orca jump out of the water. It was great day!

Finalization of Adoption & We Found a Church

2009-07-29T09:05:00.004-07:00

I meant to post this last week but my sister was in town and it has been crazy.

Last Monday, we finalized Brandon's adoption in CA. In CA they do the finalization and the name change at the same time. Now we wait 1 year for the birth certificate (that is how back logged CA is). I know need to get to work on his certificate of citizenship. All the paperwork is getting close to being done. :)

We are doing well here. B turns 15 months today. I can't believe my baby is already 15 months. I am hoping he is now over 20 lbs. so he can face forward in his car seat. He is walking everywhere and is starting to babble more.

I wish folks would look at his clothes before asking how old she is. I know he has pretty features and has longer curly hair but come on folks, a navy blue basketball outfit is a boy!

We have been busy. We went camping for the first time with my sister. I have to say that it went really well and that we all enjoyed it. Andrew & I did realize that sharing a sleeping bag with an infant does not work. We go camping again soon for 2 nights w/ some of Andrew's friends and we will be bringing the pack and play.

We are also moving again. Yes our 2nd move in under 5 months. We did not buy a house - I still think the house prices are too much for us out here. But we are moving 45 minutes from where we are now and it is supposed to be a family friendly area. There is a neighborhood pool and swim team so that will be fun next summer. We have registered Logan for school and are hoping he gets in this time around. I loved homeschooling and could have continued but we have not found a social outlet for any of us and we feel like the kids need this. We will see if this is what God wants for our children's education and if not and He wants us to home school then we will explore that again.

And last, I had posted about trying to find a Church. We were not having much luck finding a place that felt like home and then we went to this Church, Abundant Life Christian Fellowship, and we were like this is where we belong. After attending 2 times, we joined. Now let me tell you several cool things about this Church. 1. The staff, volunteers and people who attend are super friendly. 2. The Pastor is a gifted speaker. 3. We definitely feel like it will challenge us in our walk and help us grow. 4. It is the most diverse Church I have ever seen and the coolest thing is it is not segregated. The Pastor is African American and at the membership class was talking about how folks usually attend Churches where they look like the Pastor. He said all of a sudden his Church was 20% white and he was like I love you but what are you doing here. He said next thing he knew it was 50% white. He said folks call him all the time asking how he was able to build up a diverse (and it is all ethnicities) Church and he says it is all God and points out that this is what Heaven will look like and it is! And I think the thing that touched me is Andrew said it is the 1st time he has been at a Church (he has gone his whole life) that he did not feel like he stood out. He just was one of the people there worshiping God. It made me sad that he has always felt like he stood out but what an understanding that gives him to our children if they ever feel like they stand out b/c of the color of their skin. I have to say that the other cool thing is that there are so many bi-racial couples that I don't feel like folks even double take with me holding Brandon. Not that I care if we stand out but it is just amazing to be at a place so diverse that skin color does not even cause a double take.

This is what it means to be held - Prayers needed

2009-07-17T05:35:00.004-07:00

The lyrics to Natalie Grant's song held make me cry every time. I feel what she sings, to take a child from his mother while she prays is appalling.

I just read on our board that a little boy named Kiflu is in the hospital. The fear I felt becomes real again. I hurt for this family as I've been there where you don't know, want to be with your child more then anything, feel helpless, and anxiously await the next phone call and each time it rings and you see the area code for AAI a paralyzing fear comes over you as you answer it to hear the next update.

When I saw the email, tears sprung in to my eyes. I am praying for this guy, come on God, heal this little boy. Please join me in praying for him.

The lyrics to held

Two months is too little
They let him go
They had no sudden healing
To think that providence would
Take a child from his mother while she prays
Is appalling

Who told us we’d be rescued?
What has changed and why should we be saved from nightmares?
We’re asking why this happens
To us who have died to live?
It’s unfair

Chorus:
This is what it means to be held
How it feels when the sacred is torn from your life
And you survive
This is what it is to be loved
And to know that the promise was
When everything fell we’d be held

This hand is bitterness
We want to taste it, let the hatred NUMB our sorrow
The wise hands opens slowly to lilies of the valley and tomorrow

(Chorus) ...
This is what it means to be held
How it feels when the sacred is torn from your life
And you survive
This is what it is to be loved
And to know that the promise was
When everything fell we’d be held

Bridge:
If hope is born of suffering
If this is only the beginning
Can we not wait for one hour watching for our Savior?

(Chorus)
This is what it means to be held
How it feels when the sacred is torn from your life
And you survive
This is what it is to be loved
And to know that the promise was
When everything fell we’d be held

The one year anniversary of Zinabu's death

2009-07-10T06:59:00.004-07:00

Today marks the one year anniversary of our sweet son Zinabu's death.

Just thinking of the pain and hurt we experienced at this time last year brings tears to my eyes. I can remember exactly how the phone call went from Kim. It was horrible and I basically fell to the ground and cried and screamed. Logan was at swim practice and some ladies there, whom I did not know, had to drive us home. Andrew was gone. My friend Sarah was over ASAP. I remember Heidi coming and sitting with me on the bed, putting her arm around me and just crying. I remember my friend Beth bringing over dinner and Andrew finally getting home and just having him there, finally, because he understood the pain. I remember shouting out to God "why" as I laid on the floor and hit and kicked it and being so angry and hurt. How could He take our son. I remember wanting to hold Zinabu and lying on the couch with his picture on me and imagining holding him and rubbing his sweet little body.

The pain and anger and grief we experienced was so overwhelming.

To many he was just an orphan we were referred. To us, he was and is our 1st Ethiopian son. He was a precious gift to us. This little boy made an impact. We raised so much money last year to help other orphans in Ethiopia. We were able to share with a friend of ours what the grief of losing a child is like as they had a friend who lost theirs. In this little way I felt like our little boy is still impacting this world for the better.

We still talk about him, especially Logan.

I hated this day a year ago. The pain of losing him still hurts but the joy of Brandon Tsedeke is so alive. Sometimes it is hard because we had to experience one to experience the other. I don't always get God's ways but they are not mine to get, just to trust.

I think about Zinabu's Mom. She made a decision that had to be so hard and felt like she was giving her son a better life and he did not make it. My heart still breaks for her. I was told that they told her but we could not meet her b/c it would be just bringing up bad memories. I often wonder if she knew Brandon Tsedeke's birth mom. Do they both know I love their sons or how I pray for both of them?

So today, please pray for the orphans of this world. Thank God you have food and health care. Maybe, in honor of our son, do something to help those in need. Sponsor a child (we do and met our child in Ethiopia and it too was life changing), donate money to help feed the hungry here in the US.

Zinabu will not be forgotten and will always be loved and one day we will hold our son in our arms. I am thankful for him. Sometimes I think what if someone else got his referral and had to go through the pain of losing him and I realized I would not give up the pain. He was ours and was meant to be. He is part of our family and our story. He was chosen for us if even for a short time on this Earth.

Hawaii

2009-07-06T10:49:00.003-07:00

We are back from Hawaii. We went there with my family to celebrate my mom's 60th birthday.

We had a great time but boy are we beat. I figured we would hang out on the beach and just relax which we did but we also went and went. We were so exhausted at night. It was so nice having my parents and sister there to help with the kiddos. It was a great vacation.

Here are some pics. We went to the volcano to watch the sunset (we were going to do the sunrise but decided 2:30 a.m. was too early to leave), Ashlea & Andrew went surfing, Logan, Kendra, Andrew, Ashlea, and I went snorkeling and saw dolphins, my folks and sister went on a zip line, and my folks and L&K went on a helicopter ride.

And Andrew & I had a date day!

Brandon is also walking and is working on his 6th tooth!

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High Chairs, Screaming and Father's Day

2009-06-21T13:54:00.004-07:00

We are going to Hawaii in a few weeks. We are staying at condos. To get a high chair it is 15 dollars per day plus tax. How crazy is that.

Brandon Tsedeke does not like to sit in high chair. He wants to crawl out. He thinks it is so funny. And I don't have the straps anymore (it is over 6 years old and our other kids never needed them). So he likes to stand up and then step on the tray. He just smiles and thinks he is so funny. Of course, we are right there and don't leave him their by himself. But it makes dinner time hard and quick.

2 nights ago Andrew & I went to bed (well, probably more like it he went to tuck me in to bed and then was going down to work) and guess what - our bed was full. Not with one child, but 2. Logan & Kendra had both moved into our bed and were lying right next to each other. So cute. We slept in their beds that night. Kendra said she liked our bed better and would sleep there from now on :)

Brandon likes to scream. I mean it is hard to hear anyone or anything with as loud as he screams. Kendra also likes to scream. One of her favorite super hereos is black canary who has a super power to scream and defeat folks. Well, Kendra and I were downstairs and Brandon and Andrew were upstairs. Kendra lets out one of her screams and Andrew said Brandon looked up, smiled, and then started to scream. I laughed when I heard him answering his sisters scream and Andrew said it was like he was being called to with the way his face lit up and he then started to scream:)

We bought a tent the other day and were going to go camping this weekend but all sites were full. But we did camp out in our living room last weekend.

This weekend we did Father's day on Friday. The kiddos made Andrew a cookie jar and we baked him 5 different types of cookies (I am tired of baking). They greeted him at the door with wine, we had his favorite dinner (meatballs) and then had cookies. We then went for a walk and watched a movie. It was a great night. Yesterday we went hiking at Muir woods. All 3 kids loved the giant redwoods. We went for a hike that is pretty steep uphill the whole 1st half and L&K did amazing hiking. They got tired on the way down but they did great and Kendra's new favorite tree is the redwood.

Well, today Andrew wanted pizza so I made pizza for him. Now we are all hoping to take a nap while B does and we might go see a movie. I hope Andrew has had a great Father's day weekend!

And last thing - Brandon Tsedeke is 8 steps and counting.

Battle in NC and Strawberries in CA

2009-06-07T10:06:00.005-07:00

Here is a conversation with Kendra yesterday who is obsessed with her birthday party (which will be in March) and marriage. There were 2 boys in her preschool (one of which also lived across the street from us in NC). She is always saying "Ryan and Hayden fight over who is going to marry me!" So we asked her when and I am not for sure she replied but we also asked who she was going to pick and she said "I am going to fly back to NC and then they are going to battle to see who marries me" So, Ryan and Hayden are going to fight for my daughter's hand in marriage:) Too funny.

We also went strawberry picking with my friend Cara and her 2 boys. Here are a few pics. The strawberries are incredible (we are done with all we picked but we did make some smoothies, strawberry shortcake, dipped them in chocolate, and just ate them up).

Notice Brandon Tsedeke's snotty nose. His shirt was soaked in strawberry juice and even with stain stick being applied once we got home the stain still did not come out (but guess I should not have dressed him in white).

One Year Ago Today Our Lives Changed But Not How We Expected

2009-06-01T17:05:00.005-07:00

It was 9:02 a.m. and the phone rang one year ago. It was "the call." The call you wait for in the adoption world.

We were referred a 2 month old little boy - Zinabu. We were so happy, excited, in shock. He was beautiful and we were told he was in good health. What a joyous feeling. A few days before I had gotten to the point where I had lost faith that our agency would ever start giving out referrals again.

But today was our day. Obviously the dreams we had for our little boy changed over the next 6 weeks.

We still miss him. We are so blessed he came in to our lives. He is missed. I find, now more then probably ever, I wonder what he was like. See, Brandon Tsedeke just fits in as a Vaz. His laid back personality was able to handle so many transitions during his first few weeks with us. I wonder what Zinabu was like and I wish I had asked when I was at his orphange. Did he smile a lot, cry a lot, sleep well? I want to know more of this son of ours whom we never met in person or held physically, but who touched us beyond words. Who became part of our family. I wonder if we would have changed his name and if so if he still would have gone by Zinabu as everyone who knew him and us called him Zinabu. I wonder why he had to die. I don't get it. Part of us changed the day we saw his picture and the day he went to be with his Father in Heaven.

So many folks never were able to see a picture of the little boy whose eyes grabbed our hearts the moment we saw them. So here is our first Ethiopian son.

Questioning Myself???

2009-05-25T17:31:00.002-07:00

Hi,
So one thing I have found about adoption is that there are new questions that make me wonder if I am doing a good job. Questions that did not exist with my biological children (well some might have).

The first is: Bonding? Okay, I truly think (well, know) that he is. I feel so connected to him. He amazes me and makes me a better person. He delights our lives! Yet there are times I go get him from his crib and he does not smile. Then I am like, oh, is he not bonding with me? Is he not happy to see me? The thing is, I know it takes him time to just wake up but yet I find I still question myself about bonding. L&K did not always smile when I went to get them but I never thought anything of it. It was just what happened that day so no thoughts of are they bonding with me, do they think of me as their Mommy?

The second is: Scrapbooking. Logan has a big scrapbook, Kendra has a little one. Brandon will probably have a little one as well (plus his life book which I need to get working on). I hope he understand that my time is more limited with 3 and not that I don't value his pictures as much. I know most 3rd children do not have as big as photo albums but I never want him to think it is b/c he is not my biological son.

The third: Dating. When can I leave him to go on a very much needed date with my husband. I am scared to leave him as I do not want him to feel abandoned. I know others have left their children b/c of work but we have not and I just don't want to mess up the bonding that has occurred. L&K both cried when we left them with sitters so I know it is normal at this age and it only last a few minutes but that first time is always the hardest and their are new fears in my mind.

The fourth: Ethiopia. I want to make sure I incorporate Ethiopia as much as I can in to our lives. But when we took on international adoption I also realized we needed to incorporate Indian (mainly Manglorean where Andrew's family is from) culture in to our lives too. So now, me, a white born American, has to make sure I bring both Ethiopia and India in to our lives. Not that I can't do it but I want to do it well. I want them to feel a sense of pride in their heritages: American, Ethiopian, and Indian.

The fifth & sixth: Church & Does he look like me?. Okay we are searching for a Church. It is hard b/c we are looking for one that we like, we feel we can be connected in, one we can grow in, and one that has a diverse population. Now, I know all folks don't get this but in reading it talks about having your child be around people who look like him or her. Well, first off, does Andrew count? He has brown skin and was one of 2 Indian kids in his HS so he gets being different based on the color of your skin and your features. All books are written for white families adopting non-white children. So, can B look at his Daddy and say he looks like me. The other day we were at the park and a lady thought Andrew & his Dad might be Ethiopian so they have similar features. The other is how do we pick a Church. Which one of the things mentioned above is priority. I think I know the Church I would pick but it was predominately white. We tried another one which was very diverse but the sermon did not move us? How do we pick which is right for all 5 of us. Right now, we are leaning towards the diverse one.

The seventh: Too much. Taking on homeschooling, a 3rd child, and moving has been hard. The support that I had in NC is gone and even though it is there over the phone (and has been utilized much) it is still hard. Andrew has taken on a new job and his job is very time consuming and draining. I feel drained each night. Problem is how do Andrew & I get filled up? Normally we could do it to each other but we both took on new jobs and they take time. I try to do the best I can and be positive around the kiddos (they don't see the times I cry and tell Andrew how much I miss NC and my friends and our neighbors). I question when life out here in CA will seem normal. When we have friends not 30 - 70 minutes away. When will L&K&B make friends that they see regularly. How do we make life seem normal out there? This one is not really an adoption one but a life change one. Just thinking about how much I miss the people in NC brings tears to my eyes. I never had friends like the ones out there. They are incredible. My little group of friends supported us through so much (infertility, miscarriage, the death of Zinabu, the 3x it took to pass court) as well as just supporting us when we were sick and when we were happy. They rejoiced so much with us when we brought Brandon Tsedeke home. How I love them. And I knew I had it good. I knew how amazing my little group of friends and neighbors were.

Okay, I am just going on now and need to go make dinner!

What's going on

2009-05-18T07:38:00.003-07:00

Well, we had a good weekend but we are beat. We started looking for house and different areas around here, went to a kite and kid festival, tried a new Church whose service was 2+ hours (but L&K loved it but it is hard to keep a 12 month old occupied for 2 hours), and sweated in the 102 degree weather without an ac in our house.

We have been off of school for a little over 2 weeks and had fun celebrating both L&B's birthdays. We had my Mom & sister visit as well as Andrew's folks. So it has been a fun track out.

Today, we are back to home schooling. I have to say I missed it and the first few days without the schedule of home schooling during the day threw me for a loop. I was used to life with home schooling.

Oh yeah, and yesterday was 3 months since we first held B. How quickly time is flying. He is doing well. Loves to walk while holding our fingers and continues to smile a lot!

Enjoy your Monday!

Logan is 6 and the in-laws are visiting

2009-05-12T14:05:00.005-07:00

Well, I am late in doing this but our oldest is 6. I can't believe it. My baby is 6. 6 just seems so old. Like, wow, I have a 6 year old. He is such a kind and loving little boy. He has to be the sweetest kid I know. Really, he is. The other day we were out and he used his own money to buy me a dolphin necklace. He is always giving of himself for others. He truly has a servants heart and I pray the he uses it to serve others and glorify God.

Here are pics from his birthday. I did not have candles so he had to blow out the lighter 6 times :)

My in-laws have been in town the last week and we are having a great time. Here are some pics from their visit.

Kendra & I also got our hair cut. She got 4 inches cut off and I had about 7 inches. I really like my hair so much better. I am glad I quit being lazy and cheap and just went and got it done. I feel so much better.

Brandon Tsedeke is ONE

2009-05-03T19:55:00.003-07:00

Our sweet little baby boy is one.

Here are some pictures from his birthday (on Thursday) and from his 1st birthday party (Saturday).

As for what he is doing at the old age of 1:
1. Crawling (it has gone from a belly crawl to a hand and knee or hand and feet crawl)
2. Blowing kisses (this is new)
3. Stopping to clap anytime anyone says "yeah" or claps
4. Eating and loving it (he was not a huge fan of the cake and mainly tried to fling the icing off his hands)
5. Talking - and a lot (just not yet saying mama)
6. Pointing to my nose when I say where is Mommy's nose
7. Pulling up and cruising
8. Smiling and laughing and more smiling and laughing
9. Dancing, he hears music and starts moving
10. Waving bye bye

Happy Birthday son! Logan's is in 2 days :)

A comic from a guy who works with Andrew @ Cisco

2009-04-24T16:21:00.004-07:00

Andrew told him the only thing that was missing was his wife beating with a stick him saying "why did you make me move?"

2 months

2009-04-17T09:33:00.005-07:00

Our sweet son has been with us now for 2 months. Time has flown by.

Brandon Tsedeke is doing wonderful. Just yesterday he started crawling on his hands and knees (before it had been a very fast army crawl). He loves to scream, dance, and smile.

He laughs more and more each day. Kendra & Logan are doing well. Kendra had a few rough weeks but it seems to be getting better. But we have had a lot of change so I understand why it was hard on her. They both love playing with him and he looks for them.

He still likes to suck on our noses but now that his two teeth are fully in it hurts as he will all of a sudden bite down.

We are doing well here in CA. The 3rd week was a hard week for me but overall they have been really good. We have been trying to get our and try new parks and have started to meet up with old friends.

We had a great Easter. We are still on a hunt for a Church but are enjoying it and wanting to find the best place for all 5 of us.

Here are pics of Brandon Tsedeke 2 months ago and now as well as some Easter pics! Have a joyous weekend. We have a fun one planned of dinner at friends' house tonight, a birthday party and baptism tomorrow, and a birthday party on Sunday.

Change is Hard

2009-04-13T16:28:00.002-07:00

So, we went to our old Church for Easter. The sermon was great.

It is funny though how hard change is. When we first moved to NC we had trouble finding a Church b/c I wanted one just like MPPC. We finally found HCC and liked it but there was part of me that wished it was more like MPPC. Now, after 7 1/2 years at HCC it is what I know and I would not change the things I wished were different before. So now we find ourselves back at MPPC and I am wishing it did a few things like our Church in NC.

We enjoy the sermon and are going to try one of MPPC satellite sites.

We will see. I know we need to get plugged in to a Church but I want to make sure it is the right one for all 5 of us where we can grow in our walk with Jesus.

Also, HCC's children's ministry. It is the only one I know and it was so top notch. L&K were both learning so much and the security for picking up the children allows you to feel super secure. L&K both enjoyed Sunday School at MPPC and were so ready to go.

I think the one down side about home schooling and having a limited amount of friends (and none in the general area) is that the kiddos don't have other children to play with. We do get out to parks and I am trying to find home school groups but not a lot of luck so far.

In fact, last week I had absolutely no adult contact from M-F, minus Andrew. That is so hard when I am used to having contact every day with friends, as are L&K.

But I keep reminding myself that I hated NC the 1st year. I had quit my job and was looking for a new one. Once I found a job it was a job I did not like. I did not have many friends in NC and the friends I had from the past and I had grown apart. But in the end NC became our home and I met the most amazing people who are the most amazing and loving and supportive and honest and caring friends I have ever known. So I keep telling myself, hang in there. Give it time and you will make friends and find where you belong out here in CA.

But change is still hard.

I'll post Easter pics soon. I am way behind in everything.

I am still enjoying having the kiddos around all the time and teaching them. I am just finding it hard to get other things done b/c I teach them when B naps and it is so hard to do things when he is awake because he is everywhere!

Well, we are off to get our CA driver's licenses today.

Here are some pics from our 1st 2 days in Ethiopia. The family is the family of the child we sponsor through Compassion International.

CA

2009-04-05T08:00:00.004-07:00

So the weather has been absolutely beautiful since we arrived in CA. It has been great. We have been outside everyday and we are all loving it.

Here are pics from us at the beach last weekend. We met my good friend Cara and her husband and 2 sons at the beach and for dinner. It was a lot of fun and I know L&K had fun playing with Diego.

Things here are okay. I mean we are enjoying ourselves. We got the garage all organized as well as the playroom and we found our one missing box of bathroom stuff (it was in the grill). I miss my friends though. I miss being part of their day to day lives.

But enjoy some pics of Brandon Tsedeke's first time at the beach or in the water. He crawls on his belly so notice the trail he leaves behind. We did borrow a shirt from Cara so that he did not get sand burn on his stomach.

We went to our old Church today. The children did not go to childcare so I did not hear much of the sermon but Andrew said it was good. It was a satellite site. We are going to try another satellite as well as the main building of the Church to see where we feel like we fit.

Enjoy your Sunday.

Home schooling

2009-04-02T07:30:00.003-07:00

I had wanted to home school Logan this summer when he started kindergarten but my dear husband was not a fan so we decided to put him in school and see how it went. Well, it went great and Logan had a wonderful teacher and truly enjoyed it. So both Andrew & I felt really good with our decision.

Then came CA. I called the Fremont school we are assigned to go to and found out that Logan would be #20 on the wait list to get in to our assigned school. They told us it would probably not be until 2nd grade that he would get in. So, basically, they would put him in one school and then when a spot opened up we could switch schools.

We were not happy with this at all. So, Andrew & I decided that I would home school.

We are 3 days in to it and I am LOVING it. I love having them at home. I love going on hikes as part of their school day. I love seeing their minds work. I love not being rushed in the morning to get to school.

Now, this is all new to me and I need to do a lot more research. I have ordered some books and Logan's teacher gave me a lot of things to do. But I am glad I am getting the chance to try this.

We went to Santa Cruz beach this weekend. It was SO much fun. They kiddos loved it. I have pics of Brandon at the beach crawling through the sand but I can't find the cable that connects the camera to the PC. I hope to find it in the boxes soon and post some pics. We also met my friend Cara who has a son Logan's age and Brandon's age. I think Logan & Kendra had so much fun having another child to play with as it had just been the 3 kiddos all week.

Okay, Brandon is up so off to start our day. Enjoy yours!

Christmas, Easter, and Kendra's 4 year old pics

2009-03-28T07:19:00.004-07:00

No Washer and Dryer & CA shock

2009-03-27T06:50:00.003-07:00

So, our dryer is not working in CA. My poor husband has spent so much time switching wires, plugs, etc. to find out that the circuit breaker is 50A and the dryer is 30A and that it is a fire hazard if he plugs the dryer and that the outlet is for a range not a dryer.

So I have one week of laundry to do at a laundry mat with 3 children. Sounds fun. And Brandon's diapers leaked 2x yesterday while he was sleeping and he had 2 blow outs (which he rarely has) to add to the list.

But we are going to the beach this weekend. We need to do something fun as every time I look at housing prices around here I get so sad and upset. I am not for sure who said prices are dropping in CA but here is what I've found in the area near us:
1. A duplex that is 1453 square feet for a bargain $750,000
2. A 2100 square foot house with 5 bedrooms, a small family room, and an upgraded kitchen for $1,038,000

How can folks afford to buy out here? It just makes me so sad as we had a great house that we could have stayed in for a long time with amazing neighbors and lots of kids. We have seen maybe one young kid out around here but we are in a good school district so there should be kids (even though Logan can't get in to the school for 2 years - he is number 20 on the wait-list for kindergarten). Kendra was like lets go find the 3 & 4 year olds. She had a boy born 8 days after her right across the street and is so used to having him around. He had a brother one year older then Logan, next door to them there was a boy 9 months younger then Logan, and next to them was a girl 6 months younger then Logan and a boy 6 months older then Brandon. And those were just the ones we saw daily.

God has a plan with us being out here (apparently buying a house will not be part of his plan but that is okay as we moved so Andrew did not have to travel as much). I am not good with change especially when NC was home. It is hard to explain the friendships we had there. They were more then friends they were our family.

We do have an orange tree and have made fresh squeezed orange juice. It was great.

Do all your kids have the same Daddy?

2009-03-23T12:48:00.003-07:00

So we are in CA. It is hard to be here as I already miss NC and our friends and neighbors.

But I have to tell you about a conversation last night at the grocery store.

We are walking around buying groceries, I was holding Brandon and a lady says "oh he is cute and so little." I said "yes and that he is just smaller for is age." She then said "Are all these children yours" and I said "yes" and she said "They all look so different, do they all have the same Daddy?" I said "yes" and then explained how L&K were bio and B was adopted from Ethiopia.

Just something funny to share. Off top unpack some more. How fun.

One month today

2009-03-17T04:24:00.003-07:00

Well, one month ago today we were waiting for my folks to call us so we could tell Logan and Kendra all about their little brother. Can you believe it has been a month since we first held him in our arms. Wow, time has flown.

Brandon Tsedeke is an amazing little boy. He is a happy boy who smiles at everyone. He is just a joy and just fits in perfectly with our family. I could not imagine our days without him.

As for bonding and everything, we are doing absolutely great. Yes, there are hard moments as we try to parent 3 children and move across the country, but overall is it just going fabulous. Brandon Tsedeke is wonderful.

When it took us so long to get through court I was pretty upsets b/c I kept thinking of all the things I was missing, especially a lot of first. Well, I am sure I did miss a some first and of course I wish I had him 2 months earlier, but I am amazed at all "the first" we are seeing.

He got his first tooth 1 1/2 weeks after coming home. He can now go from lying down to sitting. He pulls up on everything. His 2nd tooth is about to break through. He eats table foods (in fact that is all he wants to eat).

And another thing is the first 2+ weeks we had him he smiled non stop but never laughed. Now, he laughs. What a joy it is to hear.

He also never cried in Ethiopia (minus the take off at 11:30 p.m. from Addis). He now cries. I was telling our social worker this and she was saying it is a good sign b/c it means he now knows he can voice his needs and they will be met. He also used to suck his thumb a lot and he still does but a lot less. I feel like the sucking of the thumb was to pacify himself and now he does not have to.

He also gained over 1 lb. in the 1st 2 weeks home! He is getting big so fast:)

We are adjusting well. There are times I tell L&K to be patient w/ Mommy as I try to figure out how to be a mommy of 3. But I love it and I love him.

Andrew had a fear before we adopted. He did not know if he could love an adopted child as much as a biological child. We had many talks about this. I am so glad my husband was able to voice his fears to me (and to others who had adopted and they shared their stories with him). But his fears are gone. He loves Brandon Tsedeke and Brandon Tsedeke loves him. I mean they both light up when they see each other. It is incredible. My other 2 at this age were so into mommy b/c of "the boob" (I breast fed) so it is so nice for Andrew (and I am actually loving it and not upset or jealous at all).

I found it hard at first to tell folks you can not hold him. But I told myself I needed to do it and once I said "we are not letting folks hold him so he can bond more with us since he was held by so many in the orphanage" I was able to do it and found most folks are like "oh, I totally understand." And this has been hard b/c he reaches out to everyone and they are like "okay I'll take him." Even in the sling he reaches out. He is just social.

We have him out and about a lot more then I would have planned, but we are moving, have had birthday and going away parties, and are in temporary housing and I have 2 other kiddos who I have to pick up, etc so it is hard. I try, on days we can, to have a schedule for him. But luckily he just goes and smiles. My one friend was saying he has a personality to handle all of this.

I love him. He is incredible. He has so much personality and life. His eyes light up and makes me smile. He has had ear infections the whole time we have had him, horrible ones at that, and he just smiles. He is amazing and we love him. I am so glad he is our son!

But we feel so blessed he is our son. Can't wait to see what the next month has in store!

Questions & thoughts?

2009-03-15T03:19:00.004-07:00

So, yesterday we went to take our family Christmas pictures. When we were there a little 6 year old girl said "Mommy, why does that white mommy have a black baby?". The Mom was horrified. She was like I am so sorry. I told her no worries. The Mommy said something to the effect as we all come out with different skin colors. The little girl said "oh, he is adopted" and the Dad was like "no, he looks like his father." I did say he was adopted but yes he does look like his Dad. I could tell the parents were mortified that she asked these questions but I felt like she was a kid just asking a question. I mean she is a kid. The other day Kendra was telling a stranger how Logan was in my belly first, and then her, and then Brandon was in another mommy's tummy. Then she went on to start asking why she was not in my tummy first.

But then we went to the mall and a man was like "let me see your baby." He was at one of those hand lotion places where they try and stop you and then if you say no thanks they say let me ask you a questions. Well, I was trying to so no thanks and he stopped me. He said "let me see your baby. Is he yours?" I was like "yes, he is mine" and he said "really". He then was like "all 3 of them are yours, and I was like yes". Now, I did not have Andrew with me at the time. I do think if Andrew is around that I won't get asked questions of if he is mine or not.

We took this class so long ago and it gave you good responses to answer to questions like this. Unfortunately, I forgot most of them (you have to take the classes before you send in your dossier and the time to bring out son home was over 15 months from those classes). So, how do you respond? I was fine with my response of "yes he is mine". But if any of you have good responses to these type of questions please leave a comment and let me know (or if you are doing a better job then I am in remember what suggestions they make in classes).

Yesterday the question did not bother me, but I just feel I need to be prepared with responses. I think in the future it may bother me b/c at some point I don't want Brandon hear these questions and then start questioning if he is mine or not. I want my responses to people to make him feel confident, secure, loved. I also want to answer in a gracious loving manner as I think folks ask out of curiosity and not to be rude. I just want to make sure that I respond in a way that allows Brandon to feel secure.

I did get a few questions when we first had Logan trying to figure out if he was my biological son or not.

And I am going to post soon on how things are going here. Just wanted to hear what other families do. But I have to say for the most part strangers just ask me mommy questions (i.e. How old is he, is he mobile, etc.) and of course comment on how incredibly cute he is :)

Leaving our first home

2009-03-10T08:32:00.003-07:00

Well, last night was our last night in our 1st house. The house we brought all three of our children home to.

We have loved this house, the neighbors, and the memories we have here.

It is so hard to leave. If we had stayed in NC I think we would have been here for a long time. It is just
a great house.

We have been busy. We had both kiddos birthday parties last week as well as a get together with our neighbors.

We are staying here for 12 more days and then heading to CA.

I'll try and post some pics from Logan & Kendra's birthday parties. They were both a ton of fun. Here are some pics from our snow last week.

Secret Envelope

2009-03-05T04:13:00.002-08:00

So, when you leave the US Embassy in Addis they give you a manila envelope with your child's picture on it. It is a very thick envelope and is sealed. You basically take this with you through immigration, they open it and stamp a few things and then let you through.

Well, the picture of Brandon Tsedeke was SO good. I had taken a picture of it before hand. But as we waited (there were about 20 adoptive families and we were the 2nd to last ones to be seen) I noticed that they just threw the envelopes away. So when they finally called Vaz and we went up I asked if we could keep the envelope. And they said yes!

So here is his great picture.

Brandon's 1st Christmas

2009-02-28T17:28:00.003-08:00

So this year at Christmas Santa filled Brandon's stocking and he had gifts under the tree.

The gifts waited in his room until he came home and when he did he got to take part in his first Christmas. He was dressed in an my first Christmas outfit and everything.

It was very important to me that we were able to celebrate his first Christmas with him even if it was in February. In fact, we did not take Christmas pictures this year, well yet. Each year we take a family picture at Christmas and this year we decided we would wait until we were all together to take the picture. So we go in 2 weeks to take our 2008 Christmas picture :) We will also be taking their Easter picture as well. Will post them once we have them.

Here are some pics from Brandon's first Christmas

Going back to Cali

2009-02-26T04:58:00.002-08:00

So, I think I posted a while back that we had a lot going on.

Adding a new child to the mix was not enough so we decided to put our house on the market
and move cross county.

It has been a long 5 months not only trying to pass court and get our son but also to sell our house.

We sold our house the Sunday before we left for Ethiopia and we move in 3 1/2 weeks (the movers
are here in 1 1/2 weeks and Andrew leaves in 2 1/2).

It is crazy around here trying to adjust to jet lag, get ready to move, etc.

But we are doing absolutely great! Brandon is just fitting in to our family. He is just a pure delight.

So, CA here we come again. We are SO sad to be leaving NC. It is home. We have met the most
amazing people here who we truly love and they are like family to us. It has so many memories for us.

But I'll try and post some new pics of the kiddos soon. They took their first bath together last night (glad
we have a garden tub). and they had a lot of fun.

We also had his doctor's appointment and it went well.
Off to get our little guy - he is waking up from his nap.

Brandon Tsedeke

2009-02-23T03:40:00.004-08:00

We are doing great. The kiddos are loving their brother. Will post more later but at least wanted to get some pics on here. We are doing great and he is amazing.

In dc

2009-02-21T08:24:00.001-08:00

We are in DC. Tired but great and ready to get home and see Logan and Kendra

Sent from my iPhone

We made it

2009-02-21T05:07:00.004-08:00

We ate here binternet problems. More later

Sent from my iPhone

We made it

2009-02-21T05:07:00.002-08:00

We ate here binternet problems. More later

Sent from my iPhone

We made it

2009-02-21T05:07:00.000-08:00

We ate here binternet problems. More later

Sent from my iPhone

Embassy Appointment

2009-02-19T08:34:00.001-08:00

Hi,
We made it through the US Embassy today :)

We were there a long time but all went well.

We pick up Tsedeke's passport tomorrow and then head home.

We can't wait.

Logan & Kendra, we miss ya'll so much and Tsedeke can't wait to
meet you and Mommy and Daddy can't wait to hold you and play
with you and kiss you!

We will be home in 50 hours!

Hi

2009-02-18T07:38:00.001-08:00

Hi Everyone - we are doing well! Tsedeke is here with us and is a
blast. Very active and smiley little boy. Definitely a fast crawler
as well - he goes after anything not nailed down. We head to the
embassy tomorrow to get his Visa and then start the journey back on
Friday!

love,
Andrew

Tsedeke

2009-02-17T08:32:00.001-08:00

Today was the day we met our son.

It was incredible! Okay, he is an amazing little boy. When we went to DZ to pick him up the other family's daughter was brought out first. We were video taping that and then I see the nanny come around the corner with Tsedeke in their arms. I gasped. Got the cameras ready and went to him and cried.

He is beautiful. So amazing.

We had a nice time at the orphanage finding out about him, seeing his bed (the top bunk which is funny b/c in CA our kiddos will have to share a room and we tell Kendra she is too young for the top bunk), and just taking it all in. The nannies there were so nice and really seemed to love him.

He went to us but was kind of reserved. On the ride back to Addis he fell asleep in my arms :) Loved it.

Then we got back to the room and his personality started to shine. We gave him his first bottle, changed his diaper and put him in a new outfit. We did get to take him home in the outfit he was in (a lovely jumper with red daisies on it) and he also got to keep a toy he was clutching.

He can sit. He can crawl and fast. All of a sudden his personality started to shine. He smiles and laughs. Right now his favorite toy is a tooth brush. He does not have any teeth but is getting some. We were able to talk to Logan & Kendra and they were like come home now! How we wish we could.

He is so much personality. I had to put him in a sling and rock him to get him to go to sleep. He is still asleep. He sucks his thumb.

When he does not want something he makes this one cute sounds. He is still napping and we will probably be up all night.

For those that knew Logan and how he did not sleep the nannies told us he plays when they put him down for bed and when he wakes up all he wants to do is play. So looks like he is like his brother.

But off to the boys. this is such a praise! We have him in our arms and he is wonderful.

Enjoy your Tuesday!

Things we are glad we brought & wish we knew or brought

2009-02-15T23:19:00.001-08:00

Hi,

So we were talking about this last night - what we are glad we brought.

So here are some things we already know we are glad we brought:

1. Laptop. It is nice to have it to blog but mainly b/c it is easier to journal on a computer and it is nice to have somewhere to download pictures. You have so much you want to write and it is nice being able to type it all. We already have pages of typed journaling.

2. We brought a video camera and 2 digital cameras. I would have 2 batteries for each just in case one runs out and you want to take more pics/video and don't have time to recharge.

3. 2 outlet adapters. We brought so many electronics and have to charge so much it is nice being able to plug 2 things in at the same time. Plus you have the cel phone that our contact gives you and you need to charge it as well.

4. We had a prepaid calling card ready for my folks so that they could call us. It is so nice hearing from the kiddos.

5. Since we brought our laptop we brought a few movies. Now for us we are liking it b/c it is something to do when you are tired but can't sleep. I watched one when I was up in the middle of the night sick, we watched one on the plane, etc.

6. Alarm clock. Some days you have to get up super early and it is nice having an alarm. Plus it is nice if on the first few days you need to nap and don't want to oversleep for your next thing to do. Ours is on our watches so it works out nicely.

7. Andrew is glad he brought a hat for the hippo boat ride as the sun was intense.

8. Andrew reads a lot. He is glad he brought a few books. I have one. I think I'll probably finish it before we leave but one is probably good for me.

9. Light jackets are nice

10. Backpack to carry things ins.

Things we wish we brought / knew

1. I am glad we have more then one email account. For a while we could not send from Yahoo in Addis, only Gmail. In Awasa for a while I could not send from either but could send my sister an email on facebook and she was able to post for us. So I'd have a few ways to post or email just in case one sight is slow.

2. I wish I knew more Amharic. Monica has a great book and can now pick up things in conversations. Us, not so good. I thought I would study from our book on the plane but it is not as good as theirs

3. I wish I brought the cable to connect my video camera to my laptop. Mainly b/c there is some video we have taken that is priceless and can never be replaced and I would love to have it backed up already.

4. We did not bring any food. Now I know Beth P told me too but we had 5 bags at 50 lbs each and our carry-ons were more then they were supposed to be. But I think some saltine's would have been nice

5. Don't eat the shero in Alaba. That is what got both Monica & I sick.

6. They do weigh your carry-ons 2x when you get on Ethiopian Air. We had to do some rearranging. Pockets are good for heavy things.

7. Bring your ticket with you when you confirm your flights at the Hilton. We did not and Monica was fine but we had to go back as they could not find Tsedeke's ticket.

8. When I gave EVADO lice medicine they seemed excited. So it may be something you want to bring?? They were so thankful for all donations. We kept asking what was needed and our contact kept saying anything. Andrew said they also said they needed diapers.

9. Grocery stores do not have any formula so you can't buy some here to get them used to the transition so bring enough for the days before you get home.

10. you can shop in Awasa and the prices are cheaper but there is only one or 2 stores.

11. When you go shopping in Addis don't buy everything at the 1st shop as you will go to more.

For those families who have infants still here - between Monica/Brad and us we have a 36 galloon container filled to the top with formula as well as 2 more big cans. I don't know how long it will last but hopefully it will help out with the shortage for a while.

Things we are glad we brought & wish we knew or brought

2009-02-15T22:02:00.001-08:00

Hi,

So we were talking about this last night - what we are glad we brought.

So here are some things we already know we are glad we brought:

2. We brought a video camera and 2 digital cameras. I would have 2 batteries for each just in case one runs out and you want to take more pics/video and don't have time to recharge.

4. We had a prepaid calling card ready for my folks so that they could call us. It is so nice hearing from the kiddos.

7. Andrew is glad he brought a hat for the hippo boat ride as the sun was intense.

8. Andrew reads a lot. He is glad he brought a few books. I have one. I think I'll probably finish it before we leave but one is probably good for me.

9. Light jackets are nice

10. Backpack to carry things ins

Things we wish we brought / knew

2. I wish I knew more Amharic. Monica has a great book and can now pick up things in conversations. Us, not so good. I thought I would study from our book on the plane but it is not as good as theirs

4. We did not bring any food. Now I know Beth P told me too but we had 5 bags at 50 lbs each and our carry-ons were more then they were supposed to be. But I think some saltine's would have been nice

5. Don't eat the shero in Alaba. That is what got both Monica & I sick.

6. They do weigh your carry-ons 2x when you get on Ethiopian Air. We had to do some rearranging. Pockets are good for heavy things.

7. Bring your ticket with you when you confirm your flights at the Hilton. We did not and Monica was fine but we had to go back as they could not find Tsedeke's ticket.

9. Grocery stores do not have any formula so you can't buy some here to get them used to the transition so bring enough for the days before you get home.

Awasa

2009-02-15T13:38:00.000-08:00

So, today was our day in Awasa,

Both Monica and I are sick. I am getting better. Monica had it a lot worse then us.

The power just went out as I am typing this.
We were supposed to meet at 10 to go on the hippo boat but since Monica & I both felt so sick we decided to go at 1. Andrew & I both took naps and barely woke up by 1:00. But off we went – all 4 of us. The hippo boat was cool. At one time we saw about 5 or 6. Of course I did not get a picture but I did get some good ones. We also saw lots of birds and folks fishing. It was fun.

Then we went to go shopping but all the shops were closed. So we headed to a park to see monkeys (Not for sure what kind). We also saw birds here.

Then we decided to just drive around. So we left Awasa and headed out in to the country. It is beautiful. Alaba is very dry. It reminded me of Lubbock, TX – very flat and dry. But getting outside of Awasa it was gorgeous. Green with banana and coffee plants. Our contact in Ethiopia stopped at a farmer's house and asked if he could show it to us. They were so nice and let us see their house. They also showed us their crops. This is probably one of the highlights of our trip. Just meeting this family and see their house and seeing how welcoming they were to letting strangers in their house.

We are now back at the hotel. We are going to dinner. Not for sure if I will be able to go or not. Want to not let my yucky stomach make me miss anything.

So, tomorrow back to Addis. Tuesday, off to pick up our son.

We are having a fabulous time.

update

2009-02-15T06:07:00.000-08:00

We are in Awasa right now. We had a wonderful day in Alaba. It was more then I ever could have hoped for. It is a day that will stay with me for the rest of my life.

We also went to Zinaub's grave site. I did not realize we would go first thing so it took me by surprise when we got there. It was hard but so good for us. We were able to tell him how much he was loved and how he will not be forgotten.

We also went to EVADO. For those who we were supposed to take pics for, we got a lot and video too. Your children are beautiful. We had so much fun there. I could have taken all the children home with me.

I am feeling horrible right now but we are about to leave to go on the hippo boat ride. I hope we see them well, from close up but not too close :)

Tomorrow we head back to Addis and in 2 days Tsedeke will be in our arms.

The people here are amazing. The sights and sounds are incredible.

Have a glorious day!

Try a pic

2009-02-13T12:34:00.001-08:00

First Full Day in Ethiopia

2009-02-13T12:23:00.001-08:00

Hi all,
Well, we have been in Addis Ababa for 24 + hours. It seems like more then that but in an amazing way.

After we met Samuel this morning we came back to the hotel. We rested some and then Monica & Brad got back and we went to lunch. After lunch we went to the Hilton to confirm our flight back home. For some reason they could not find proof of Tsedeke's ticket. They told us we needed to come back. After leaving the Hilton we went shopping. We did okay bargaining and got some nice stuff (even though when packing one thing today I broke it). After shopping we came home to rest but our contact in Ethiopia called and I told him about Tsedeke's ticket and he said we needed to go then. So we met him downstairs and got the ticket situation cleared up.

We came back and met B&M and then headed to Abyssinia, a traditional Ethiopian restaurant. The food was awesome. Brad, Andrew & I had the meat plate. I liked the doro wat but there was another dish that rocked (but I don't know what it was called). Monica and our contact here had the Fasting plate (aka – Vegetarian. ). The vegetarian meal was amazing. We are going to try and get the stuff to make it as it was that yummy.

we then watched traditional Ethiopian dancing. We got some great video (Kendra is going to want to dance with them). We also had coffee and Andrew & I both drank some (with a few spoon fulls of sugar in them). We also had a fermented honey. I could leave it but glad we tried it.

Now we are back packing for our trip to Alaba and Awasa. Tomorrow should be an amazing day for us as we get to go to Alaba, where our son is from.

Logan & Kendra, We miss you. Hope you had a great Friday. What did you do? Have a wonderful weekend with Mamaw and Papaw. 8 sleeps till we are home. Have a great Valentine's Day. We both love you so much. Don't forget Mamaw & Papaw's surprise.

Mom & Dad, I don't think we will have phone access. You can try (please do) but don't be surprised if they don't work. I also won't have email access (I don't think I will). So hopefully I'll be able to post on Monday about our trip down south.

So far we are having a great time. The sites we take in are amazing. We feel truly blessed to be here now. 4 days till Tsedeke is in our arms! All the best! Good night.

And for those that will be traveling soon: Ethiopian Air does weigh your carry on bag. They say 15 lb. limit but were letting folks on with up to 20 lb. If you rearrange stuff (i.e. hide things in your pockets, your purse, etc.) note that you will have to weigh both when you check in and when you board. We had to do the rearranging 2x.

pics

2009-02-13T01:01:00.001-08:00

Seems like I can't attach them. :( I'll try later.

We are here

2009-02-13T00:39:00.001-08:00

Hi all,
We are here. We made it safely last night. We had an uneventful
flight. All 5 of our bags arrived :)

Once we excited the luggage area we were met by our contact here in
Ethiopia. I was not for sure how he would know us but he came right
up to us. It took us a while to load our bags as well as the family
we are traveling with (total bag count - 13). :)

We came to our hotel and dropped them off and then went to have pizza.
The pizza was really good. We got a vegetarian pizza. It came with
green peppers. I was thinking bell peppers but these were more like
jalepeno peppers. It was spicy but good.

We came back to the hotel and Andrew & i started sorting through our stuff.

Today we woke up at 7 a.m. (11:00 p.m. east coast time). We got a few
more things ready and then contacted compassion about meeting the
child we sponsor. He came to pick us up and we were able to the
Church that Compassion works with as well as Samuel's home.

Samuel's family was beautiful. His parents were so nice and kind.
Samuel had this smile. Probably one of the best smiles we have ever
seen. When we gave him his shoes he immediately put them on. I wish
we had brought a few more pairs as it seemed to be the BIG hit. He
also liked his soccer ball.

We also got to pray with his family.. It was touching and beautiful
and we are so glad we were able to meet him. We are back at the hotel
now and are going to the Hilton to confirm our flights as well as do
some sight seeing. Tonight is the traditional Ethiopian meal. Can't
wait.

I'll try to attach some pics in another post but last night when i
tried to send it would not. I hope this one goes through.

We are on the plane

2009-02-11T16:49:00.001-08:00

We are on the plane. Next time we touch the ground we will b in Ethiopia.

Sent from my iPhone

Made it to DC

2009-02-11T13:42:00.003-08:00

Hi,
Well we have made it to DC. Our flight leaves in 3 1/2 hours :) Yeah.

We have 5 bags which each way 50 pounds. It is actually crazy that they were all at 50 lbs. That is 250 lbs. plus our 2 carry-ons and purse and backpack. And I believe our carry-ons are supposed to weigh only 15 lbs. Do you know how light that is? We took almost everything out of them and they still were over. We also got to the airport early so we could rearrange our suitcases. Only thing we had to leave was liquid formula which I kind of figured since it weighed over 10 lbs. just by itself.

Here is our last picture as a family of 4. I can’t believe we are on our way. It seems crazy that today is finally here. It was hard leaving Logan & Kendra but I know they are in good hands and this trip is so worth it!

We are traveling with another family. We just met them and are so excited to share in this journey with them. :)
I will try and post once we arrive. We are waiting to check in but no one is at the gate yet. But we have seen our plane :)

Logan and Kendra, we love you and already miss you. Have a wonderful time with Mamaw and Papaw. You are the best Logan & Kendra! Good night. We will talk to you when we arrive in Ethiopia.

2 days until we leave & our last family of 4 weekend

2009-02-09T04:12:00.004-08:00

We leave in 2 days. Just 2! I can't believe it. In 8 days he will be in our arms :) We packed. Each of our 4 checked bags is 5 lbs over. :) So we need to reorganize and will probably just pay for one suitcase being over in weight.

This weekend was supposed to be family weekend. On Tuesday, Andrew's birthday, I came down with strep. I felt bad but by Saturday I was feeling okay. We had tickets to the circus and a birthday party to go to. Well, in the middle of the night on Friday, Kendra wakes up and feels sick. So Saturday a.m. we take her to the doctor and she has strep. The doctor said we could go to the circus just not touch anything. So Andrew & Logan go in one car and we meet them there.

Now at the circus it is fun watching our children. Their personalities are so different and you can tell in how they react. With Kendra, you can read it all over her face and can hear her. She is mouth open wide and saying things and just so animated. Logan, he is sitting there and taking it all he. He can see him trying to figure out how they did things. He is just taking it all in so intensely. I can't wait to see how Tsedeke will take everything in and what his personality is like.

Okay, so the kiddos were having fun at the circus and intermission came. About this point Kendra started to feel horrible. The Greatest Show On Earth started again and about 5 minutes in to it, Kendra throws up on Andrew's ear :) So we leave and go home. Logan goes to the birthday party and Kendra and I hang out.

Sunday we can't go to Church because Kendra is sick but she feels great so we are like this can be our family day. Well, Andrew comes down with strep. Yeah :) Luckily we had gone to the doctor on Saturday to get him antibiotics just in case he needed them. So the kiddos and I did stuff and Andrew rested.

It was gorgeous so we went outside and played with our neighbors.

My parents get here tomorrow. 2 sleeps until we are on a plane. We bought our children little gifts for each day we are gone and wrote their notes to them last night. It was fun and I hope it gives them something to look forward to each day. Boy, how we are going to miss them. Leaving them for so long is the hard part. When we originally decided on Ethiopia the travel was a lot shorter but we have the opportunity to go see the area that Tsedeke is from and that is worth it. Just to see more of Ethiopia. We can't wait. And Andrew does not read any blogs so a lot of the trip he has no idea what happens. I said something to the kids about going on a hippo boat and he was like we get to do that :)

Have a great Monday. :)

Heading to Ethiopia

2009-02-05T04:51:00.003-08:00

We leave in 6 days. In about 7 days and 3 hours we will be landing in Addis Ababa.

We have so much done but still need to pack. I was supposed to pack yesterday but I came down w/ strep and I feel horrible. So the things I had on my to do list did not get done. That is okay though as we still have plenty of time and have things laid out. The main thing will be dividing weight as I am sure all will be at the maximum weight of 50 lbs. I am hoping we can start working on it this weekend. But I am actually pretty relaxed about it all.

On Tuesday we celebrated Andrew's birthday. We went to a local restaurant called Angus Barn. I was already feeling miserable there so for me it was a waste but they were awesome with the kiddos. They brought them toys that they were able to keep, let them go with them to make their drinks, brought them apple sauce, gave them ice cream,etc. and all of this was free!!

On Tuesday we also got an unexpected surprise - another picture of Tsdeke. He is getting so big!

Andrew & I started dating 2 days after his birthday so the first birthday we had together was his 25th. On that birthday we went with a bunch of friends to an Ethiopian restaurant. What a journey it has been since then. 10 years ago I never thought I would be adopting from Ethiopia. I am so glad our journey has brought us to this point.

I am doing my best to trust in the sovereignty of God. I thought to myself we should have traveled in August but then I realized, no, we should be traveling now so Tsedeke can be our son. Zinabu is our son. I miscarried between Logan and Kendra. I could not imagine life without Kendra. She adds so much to our lives. I believe one day we will meet this child whom we called apple (this was pre Gwenth Paltrow) and Zinabu but His ways are so much better then my ways. The pain of losing 2 children has been so hard but the joy of Tsedeke and Kendra is so great.

I told someone the other day that we were adopting. Her comment to me was "oh, I didn't realize someone could get over things so quickly." What a horrible comment. It hurt. This has been one of my fears that folks would just think it was no big deal we just got over Zinabu. I told her that it was like when I miscarried between Logan & Kendra, I was in pain but we felt we were meant to have another child. Sometimes I can't believe the stupid things people say.

I have been meaning to write about our referral call, etc. But life has been crazy. We have so much going on it is so hard to sit down and write. I can today b/c I feel so horrible I am just sitting here. Logan & Kendra will probably watch lots of tv today. Kendra loves watching tv and we don't let her watch it often so for her it is a big treat.

We are ready. I will try and post from Ethiopia. It seems like families have not been able to as often but we will try.

In under 2 weeks Tsedeke will be in our arms and we will be able to start learning about him, his personality, his likes and dislikes, etc. We can't wait. My Dad said a cute thing to me. He said "I wish we were there so you could go and get your son." I am glad that my folks will be here to watch Logan & Kendra. They are taking off so much time ad it is a huge blessing.

Enjoy your day. It is freezing here and I have no idea how folks live in the north and deal with this cold on a normal basis. I could not handle it.